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At least it wasn’t like that other time at The Wanderers when England were 2-4

Bowled on 14th January, 2010 at 10:53 by King Cricket
Category: England cricket news, South Africa

Atherton 0, Hussain 0, Butcher 1 and Stewart 0. Now that’s a bad start.

Morne Morkel is mint, by the way; a big gallumphing lankatron of genial ferociousness.

We are still a bit mental about slow cookers but think we can get the meat to come out "stickier"

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  1. Reply
    King Cricket   //   January 14th, 2010 at 12:07

    Never judge a pitch until both teams have batted.

  2. Reply
    Bobby K   //   January 14th, 2010 at 12:28

    If we pass 200 today i will bang one out at my desk.

  3. Reply
    King Cricket   //   January 14th, 2010 at 12:33

    178-9 sounded a long way off 200 until you said that.

  4. Reply
    Bert   //   January 14th, 2010 at 13:31

    It is commonly said in cricket that you should consider the score with either two wickets added, or with fifty runs added, because this will give you a good picture of how good or bad a score really is.

    There is a similar trick you can do with the time. Take the score (England all out for 180 at tea on the first day), and simply add four days on, using the reasonable proposition that this current rain break will last for four full days.

    England, 180 all out, South Africa needing 400 or so more runs plus ten wickets in the last session to win.

    See. Much better.

  5. Reply
    daneel   //   January 14th, 2010 at 15:41

    Good old England, always able to find new depths to sink to when it really matters. It’s karma for dropping Onions for that low-rent Hoggard impersonator, I reckon.

  6. Reply
    sam   //   January 14th, 2010 at 17:02

    runs on the board

  7. Reply
    Miriam   //   January 14th, 2010 at 20:32

    At the oval test in 2008 we were sitting right in front of morne morkel when he tried to walk off the wrong way (ignoring our cries, which were of course nothing but helpful), aiming for the groundsman’s exit instead of the pavilion. He had to step over the hoarding and then walk right past everyone who had been abusing, I mean helping, him. Later when the saffers were bowling they made him field right in front of us. He gave a wry wave, if such a thing exists. I sort of love him.

  8. Reply
    Ged   //   January 14th, 2010 at 21:01

    Marginally less awful than the same venue in 1999 (we woz thrashed) and the Ashes test last year at Headingley (we woz thrashed).

    In fact, less awful than Boxing Day 2004 at Durban, the upshot of which was one of those nailbiting drawn matches with the Saffers on the wrong side of the draw for once.

    I’ll keep dreaming, but some suitable medication might help keep the dreams vivid, positive and Spiderman-free.

  9. Reply
    Dada   //   January 14th, 2010 at 21:20

    Strauss is just setting himself up for a Punteresque ‘I was right to bat first’ interview after winning this match.

  10. Reply
    SixSixEight   //   January 15th, 2010 at 00:22

    Too right! It’s karma for dropping Onions.

  11. Reply
    Ged   //   January 15th, 2010 at 07:24

    I like the idea of a Punteresque interview.

    Contrast with a Pinteresque one where he simply stares angrily and looks menacing while pausing.

  12. Reply
    Dave   //   January 15th, 2010 at 10:08

    I’d love to see Strauss trying to look menacing.

    “Now look here chaps, I’m really very cross!”

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