Brad Hogg shoved vitamin C up his jacksie – and there are still some unanswered questions about the story

Another day, another pre-Christmas autobiography by a gnarly old Australian cricketer. Brad Hogg’s The Wrong ‘Un surely warrants a mention though, if only for the anecdote about when Steve Waugh tricked him into thinking that some vitamin C pills needed to be inserted into his outbox.

The story itself has pretty much just been told in the previous sentence. “I felt uncomfortable for a few days, but I never got a cold,” he adds.

However, the background to this is extraordinary.

Firstly, Hogg apparently arrived for that debut tour with a seriously chafed groin after spending an hour on a mechanical nightclub bull before departure.

An hour. Presumably that’s cumulative rather than in one sitting, but still – that seems a hell of a long time, even before we ask how he came to conclude that would be ideal preparation for his first overseas international cricket.

Hogg also says that he was unnerved by room-mate Michael Bevan literally sleeping with his eyes open. As far as we can tell, that terrifying freakishness is something that’s pretty much just mentioned in passing.

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13 Appeals

  1. I’d quite like to go to a mechanical nightclub. Is that with robot bunny girls and stuff?

    • King Cricket

      November 10, 2016 at 7:59 pm

      Robot bunnies (girls and boys), robot bulls – a whole robot zoo we would imagine.

  2. Leicester City, Brexit, Trump, and now Brad Hogg shoving Vitamin C up his long room. Taxi for 2016.

    • What did poor old Leicester City do to deserve being shoved in there?

      …poor choice of phrasing that. Very poor.

      • No ambiguity in Sam’s phrasing as far as I’m concerned…

        …but I am alarmed to see an Oxford comma in that series, Sam. Alarmed.

      • In these worrying times, it’s good to know that Gedantry is alive and well.

      • I’m in support of the humble Oxford comma in this situation because it saves us from a fate far worse – that of having to imagine The Donald, a midlands Premier League football team and 52% of the UK population all anally inserting said dietary supplements.

        What, you just have?

        I’m sorry.

      • That’s a bit unpleasant, Mike. I suspect if we met in person I’d be shoving them in my ears

      • I’m a big fan of the Oxford comma. I use it without fail, no matter whether I’m writing internet comments, technical articles or memos to colleagues.

      • My phrasing Ged. My phrasing.

      • I am alarmed to observe the absence of an Oxford comma in that series, Bert. Very alarmed.

      • I am also alarmed to read Mike’s defence of the Oxford comma in Sam’s case on the grounds of ambiguity avoidance.

        The possible ambiguity is neither mitigated by the presence of the comma, nor would it be exacerbated by the absence of said comma.

        It is a real stretch to see ambiguity in that sentence…

        …but not as big a stretch as would be required if, for example, all Brexit voters were all to do the Vitamin C pessary trick.

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