Andrew Strauss

Andrew Strauss gets the job done with BIG RUNS

There are two sides to this, being as we’re English, we’re first going to concentrate on the negative, because that’s our knee-jerk response when our side have made a comprehensive fightback and put themselves in total control of a Test match.

Andrew Strauss shouldn’t have been playing. He shouldn’t have been given the opportunity to hit a hundred. There’s a very real chance that all this innings has done is blind people to Strauss’s poor batting and given him a stay of execution. These runs were made on a flat pitch against a weakened version of what would ordinarily be one of the weaker Test bowling attacks, even when it’s fully-staffed.

This summer, Strauss is likely to find himself near the top of England’s order facing Dale Steyn, currently one of the best fast bowlers in the world. If he’s still fundamentally the same player, playing the same way as he has been doing for the last year or so, he’ll get found out and we’ll be in exactly the same situation that we were at the same time the previous summer and a year of Test experience will have been denied to his replacement.

On the other hand, here is a batsman who’d had a host of last chances and had found himself on the last of those last chances needing a hundred. And he got one.

Batting in a big match isn’t the same as batting in a minor match, even if you face the same bowling. For Strauss personally, this was unquestionably a big match. We can’t know for certain, but his entire Test and therefore cricketing career seemed to hang on this one innings. That would put us on edge.

At this point, the man comes out and hits a hundred. Then, when he’s hit his hundred and (understandably) jumped around like a bit of a loon, he puts his helmet back on and continues, working his way to 173 not out by the close of play.

We’re far from convinced about Strauss for the reasons in the first half of today’s update, but we’re pretty delighted to start filling in the ‘pros’ column with such solid stuff.

New Zealand v England, third Test at Napier – day three
England 253 (Kevin Pietersen 129, Tim Southee 5-55)
New Zealand 168 (Stephen Fleming 59, Ryan Sidebottom 7-47, Stuart Broad 3-54)
England 416-5 (Andrew Strauss 173 not out, Ian Bell 110, Daniel Vettori 3-135)

Andrew Strauss is going to GET THE JOB DONE

Ceci believes that Andrew Strauss will “bring an air of orderly tweediness” to the England team.

We’re of the belief that smoking a pipe is the most distinguished, gentlemanly act there is and Ceci has provided us with this just that Strauss-based reassurance:

Look at that pipe. It says: ‘Enough of this nonsense. I’m here to GET THE JOB DONE.’

Another post about Andrew Strauss

It’d be better for everyone if Andrew Strauss got dropped again. We wouldn’t have to write about him and you wouldn’t have to read about him.

Strauss retired out with 104 in the second innings of the warm-up match against a New Zealand Selection XI. Frankly, he shouldn’t have been given the opportunity to justify his place in the England team – Owais Shah should have been extended that courtesy. But having been given the chance and having taken it, Strauss can at least tell himself that he’s earned his place back.

It was a good innings considering the scrutiny he’s under, but he needn’t think he’s conquered the nerves that arise from being watched more closely than your team mates. It’s a Test match next and that’s altogether more serious. If he does well, he might be over the hump. If not, he might find that after one forward step, he’s taken ten backwards.

You can pee in front of someone, Strauss, but can you urinate under the eyes of the world? Not literally. Please don’t take that literally. No… Trousers on. Trousers on!

Strauss being conspicuously indifferent to Strauss’s selection ahead of Owais Shah for England’s final warm-up match before the first Test against New Zealand

A catchy title, we think you’ll all agree.

It’s been a while since we received a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket – TOO LONG, in fact. There are a whole host of animals who have not yet expressed their indifference to this great game. We’ve never had a wholphin. We’ve never had a liger. Our inbox is always open.

Lemon Bella says:

“This is a picture of StraussCat being conspicuously indifferent when I told him that Strauss had been picked ahead of Shah.”

“As you can see, he put a lot of effort into showing exactly how much he didn’t care about this news.”

More animals being conspicuously indifferent to cricket

Andrew Strauss is a favourite, Owais Shah less so

We don’t want to get anti-Andrew Strauss because we quite like him, but his selection in England’s team for their final warm-up worries us.

Either it’s his last opportunity to earn a place in the Test team or favouritism’s crept in. Strauss was dropped because of poor form and hasn’t recovered it. His rival for a Test place, Owais Shah, hit 96 in his last innings, averages more in first-class cricket and during the last county season averaged 70. Strauss may have more Test experience, but he’s averaged 27 since he touched down in Australia last winter.

How is Andrew Strauss ahead? Apparently he’s amiable and a good team player. Of course he is. Even we’d be good-natured and garrulous if you indulged us as England indulge Strauss.

Shah’s more prickly of course, which is hardly surprising when he’s only ever been given two one-off Tests and his current rival only has to catch a plane heading to the right country in order to win his place back.

England might be embarrassed about having had to drop a centrally-contracted player, but they should be more embarrassed about this non-meritrocratic shammery.

That’s assuming that that’s what’s happening – which isn’t necessarily the case. We just like to believe everything we read, because we’re mindless.

Andrew Strauss fighting England’s selectors

Andrew Strauss has a central contract with England so the selectors want him to play. Unfortunately however, Andrew Strauss is doing his utmost to put his reselection in doubt.

Strauss was dropped for the tour of Sri Lanka after getting out for 27 in every single one of his previous 36 Test innings. Sensing that he would have to be brought back for the New Zealand tour due to that central contract, Strauss went over there early to play for Northern Districts. This perfect preparation didn’t quite go as planned as Strauss largely failed to score any runs whatsoever until a hundred in his final match.

Now, having made anything but a persuasive case, he’s back with England and opening in the warm-ups. Cue an innings of four off 25 balls and a dismissal through hitting his own wicket – excuse our politically incorrect language, but the spazziest means of getting out that there is.

Andrew Strauss is a good batsman, but not right now. It wouldn’t be fair to other players to bring him back into the side just because that was a plan that was made a few months back. Surely the plan revolved around Strauss getting back into form? We’re not convinced that’s happened.

As it stands, there’s a fair weight of evidence that Andrew Strauss is in no fit state to open the batting for England in a Test match. He looks very much like a man trying to get out in every way imaginable – and in a few ways that aren’t.

In the same warm-up match, Alastair Cook hit 85. Did anyone else notice that he did this off 81 balls?

Strauss being conspicuously indifferent to Strauss’s omission

Lemon Bella has the latest on Strauss’s omission from the England squad:

“Here is a picture of StraussCat being indifferent to Strauss (again). It means you can get two posts out of the Andrew Strauss announcement, instead of just the one.”

“You’d think in this time of crisis his namesake would at least pay a bit of attention; maybe pass comment on poor umpiring decisions, but no. StraussCat is clearly more interested in sleeping and fitting himself in a box that is much too small for him.”

Animals being conspicuously indifferent to cricket on our old site

Andrew Strauss’s omission

So Andrew Strauss has finally been dropped. It’s about time.

We don’t mean that in the sense that he’s not good enough for England, just that it seems to have been certain to happen for altogether too many matches. Strauss has been going to the crease thinking it was his last chance to turn things around for about 30 innnings now. Last chance pressure doesn’t lead to good batting.

Strauss himself says: “I have been a victim of some poor umpiring decisions, some unfortunate dismissals and a few incredibly good balls delivered at just the wrong moment,” which is a bit worrying, because we distinctly remember him being a victim of playing wide balls straight into fielders’ hands on a number of occasions.

Still, whether he comes back into the England team as a different batsman or not, it doesn’t really matter as long as he thinks he’s a different batsman. For all the luck and the bad shots, 90 percent of the problem has been batting in limbo – non-committal in stroke and uncertain of his place.

It’ll be interesting to see whether the world’s bowlers have ‘worked him out’ or whether this poor period was largely self-inflicted.