England cricket news
Kevin Pietersen shows the Aussies how it’s done
‘It’ being ‘scoring runs against Zimbabwe’.
Despite forgetting that he was right-handed for much of his innings, everyone’s most/least favourite bludgeoner hit 79 off 37 balls after England had lost a few early wickets.
England also won by quite a margin, opening up the possibility that they could knock Australia out by not losing too badly to them later today. How very English.
2 AppealsKevin Pietersen with some bird on his arm
Ho ho ho. It’s an actual bird. We weren’t really referring to a woman as a bird because that would be demeaning. We were just alluding to that usage – which is of course perfectly acceptable.
Worst post ever. Good job there’s absolutely no chance of our ever making this exact same joke a second time.
5 AppealsA one-day series that was actually good comes to an end
England and India drew their seven match one-day series after the final match at Lord’s ended in a tie. India batted first, Sachin Tendulkar scoring every single one of their 92 runs. In reply, England fell to 0-9 until Jimmy Anderson spirited up an unbelievable rearguard action scoring 92 by himself while Monty Panesar remained strokeless and scoreless at the other end. The match was also notable for a world record 20 run outs.
Okay, we admit it, we’re not around and we’ve written this in advance. Whatever the outcome of the final match, we’re sure you’ll agree that this has actually been a really good one-day series. We’ve rediscovered a lot of our appreciation for the one-day game. We thought that appreciation had moulded.
If you’re really disappointed in having nothing relevant to read, why not add something pithy in the comments so that other King Cricket readers won’t suffer the same needless fate. Or you could just call us a dick.
That should ensure a few comments for us to read on our return. It’ll be Wednesday, incidentally, but we’ve got stuff lined-up for the start of the week. Fear not.
4 AppealsRobin Uthappa totally unarsed by insane amount of pressure
What is it with ridiculously young Indian batsmen? They just think they can come over here and chase down 300 plus one-day scores without so much as a hint of knock-kneed panic or paralysing defeatism.
Yuvraj Singh and Mohammad Kaif are prime examples and yesterday Robin Uthappa, 21, shrugged his shoulders with India needing ten an over or whatever and proceeded to play the ball precisely where the fielders weren’t.
You know whose fault it is, don’t you? It’s Sachin Tendulkar, Sourav Ganguly and Rahul Dravid‘s. It always is.
Sachin Tendulkar was all of 17 when he hit 119 to save the Old Trafford test in 1990. Sourav Ganguly was 23 when he hit hundreds in his first two Tests at Lord’s and then Trent Bridge in 1996. Rahul Dravid made 95 and 84 in those same two matches – also his first two Test appearances.
England v India, sixth one-day international at The Oval
England 316-6 (Owais Shah 107 not out, Kevin Pietersen 53, Luke Wright 50)
India 317-8 (Sachin Tendulkar 94, Sourav Ganguly 53)
Luke Wright’s debut
We were moaning about Matt Prior as opener the other day. When Luke Wright was called up to the England squad, it opened up the possibility of his opening up some possibilities through opening… up.
He didn’t and Matt Prior scored six, so Wright didn’t do his opening ambitions any harm at all by hitting 50 off 39 balls on his debut.
The thinking behind Luke Wright opening is that as a quick run-scorer he’ll provide a burst of runs at the start of the innings to bookend Dimitri Mascarenhas’s barely-sane six-hitting at the close.
Luke Wright’s fifty was in sharp contrast to Mascarenhas’s haphazard power however. If you were to watch his innings highlights, you wouldn’t think it had been a particularly pacey innings. It looks like a batsman going about his business: good shots; good timing. There was nothing too outrageous that would make you think this was a frenetic knock at quicker than a run a ball. It was just good batting.
England v India, sixth one-day international at The Oval
England 316-6 (Owais Shah 107 not out, Kevin Pietersen 53, Luke Wright 50)
India 317-8 (Sachin Tendulkar 94, Sourav Ganguly 53)
Darren Gough’s sinister offer
It’s a shoe.
We’re not scared of a shoe, Darren. There’s nothing wrong with having a shoe. It’s not like you’re trying to get us hooked on class A drugs or something.
14 AppealsPaul Collingwood papers over fragile England batting line-up
Because if you’ve got a fragile batting line-up, paper is the greatest disguise. You can conceal all manner of batting sins through judicious use of paper.
England’s batting folded at Old Trafford but they got away with it. It happened at Headingley and they didn’t. Paul Collingwood’s innings of 91 not out off 71 balls was a desperate one from a top one-day player, but he was never going to get England home alone.
England are definitely improving, but you still don’t feel confident when they bat. India’s top four all made fifties. England’s managed 4, 46, 44 and 0, which isn’t really good enough.
We’re still not convinced about Matt Prior as an opener. We don’t think he likes it. He should play, but maybe bat at seven. The question then is who opens?
England want quick runs from their other opener, with Alastair Cook nominally playing the long innings. Perhaps Ravi Bopara might fit the role, although he seems to be developing into the next Paul Collingwood – a canny run-chaser.
A bit of form from Kevin Pietersen would help immensely, of course.
England v India, fifth one-day international at Headingley
India 324-6 (Yuvraj Singh 72, Sachin Tendulkar 71, Sourav Ganguly 59, Gautam Gambhir 51)
England 242-8 (Paul Collingwood 91)
England lost following a Duckworth-Lewis calculation
Rob Key fined for throwing bat in Twenty20 final
We thought it was a hissy fit of poise and dignity.
If anything, it’s the ECB who should be fined – fined for crimes against perfection. Whatever that might mean.
Luckily Rob mastered alchemy years ago and makes his own gold.
1 AppealRob Key hits 182 against Lancashire
Rob’s now hit 1130 first-class runs this season at an average of 59.47.
After last season’s aberration (he was recovering from shoulder surgery) Rob’s back on track. Now seems a good time to fill you in on The Origin Of Rob Key.
Just over a score and eight years ago, southern England was buffetted by minor geological disturbance. It barely registered as a blip on most seismometers, but this minor tremor in 1979 would eventually rock the entire world.
One of the side-effects of this tectonic fidgetting was that a very, very small volcano erupted in East Dulwich. This was a special volcano. Instead of producing lava, it spewed only the purest unobtainium.
The unobtainium became instantly solid on contact with the earth’s atmosphere. Over the coming days, the elements would ravage it into an unexpected form – the form of a man. On the seventh day it was struck by lightning, giving it life. Lo, Robert William Trevor Key (favourite band, The Fratellis; favourite food, Chinese; favourite TV show; The Office) was born.
7 Appeals
