I’m all for animals being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, but have you seen who is at the crease?

This is taken from a Kent v Surrey T20 game at the Oval. That pigeon should show more respect.

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicously indifferent to cricket, send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Jayne writes:

This is Edwin being conspicuously indifferent to the start of the Caribbean T20 final between Trinidad and Tobago and Hampshire.

Without a dish, the only way to watch cricket in Florida is online – live, highlights or past matches. ESPN3’s current on demand offerings are every match of the Caribbean T20, Bangladesh v OnZud ODIs or Bangladesh v Zimbabwe ODIs. That is it.

I suppose I could have selected Canada v Hampshire, or Combined Campuses and Colleges v Somerset instead, but his reaction would likely have been the same.

Having noticed Edwin had decided to place himself on the cable television box, the 2007 World Cup DVD was placed in the DVD player. You will notice that Edwin was conspicuously indifferent to Saj Mahmood…

… but displayed more of an interest in Gilchrist and Hayden:

“This was my cat Spike’s response to my entire attention being focused on the cricket last night.”

For the sake of clarify, we should point out that ‘last night’ wasn’t the highlights of Canada v Kenya, it was during the Ashes.

Here is my cat Spartacus being conspicuously indifferent to Nathan Hauritz, just like the Australian selectors.

When visiting my friends Simon and Esther in Durham, I couldn’t help notice their cat Monty being conspicuously indifferent to the cricket.

However, what we can see from this photo is that Mohammed Ashraful has obviously sensed Monty’s indifference to him and his batting, so has decided to show a similar level of indifference to Monty as some sort of riposte.

Later, when he thought no one was watching, I managed to take a photo of Monty being conspicously interested in the cricket. This interest appears to be too late, as Finn has clearly decided to ignore him.

Animals being conspicously interested in the cricket. Is this a new feature?

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicously indifferent to cricket, send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

This fox cub was not indifferent to cricket. In fact, he was the opposite: he was different to cricket.

So different, in fact, that he wandered into these nets, got tangled up and trapped.

Luckily, the cricket club were able to dig out Sussex CCC’s number, who had experienced similar trouble.

The county sent a man over who sorted the situation.

This is Churro, the kitten we were looking after for a fortnight.

As you can see, he isn’t conspicuously indifferent to cricket, as he is using the Wisdens as a protective wall from humans who try to stop him gnawing at books. He is obviously also ruminating on the lost years 1992-1995.

He is, though, giving Ceiling Cat a run for his money.

Stand back, Ceiling Cat, the Internet has a new overlord now.

Here are the animals of the SW household demonstrating considerable indifference to key moments of the T20 World Cup.

First up there is Jasper (aka Fatty McFat). He is technically the neighbour’s cat, but they don’t feed him and call him Nike so he has rejected this emasculating lifestyle in lieu of the endless food and Sky Sports provided chez SW and just tolerates his array of new names. Recently he was spotted being conspicuously indifferent to Gayle’s smiting of the Australian bowling at the Oval.

In the background, Gayle is seen leaving the pitch to rapturous applause, yet McFat is choosing to ignore the joy this spectacle brought to non-Australian hearts, instead indulging in a catnap.

The table is not normally that haphazardly covered with random items. It has been pointed out that perhaps the cat was unaware of the cricket due to the mountain of stuff in his sightline to the telly, however his ears are clearly also pointing away and I can vouch he was very much fast asleep in the style of MCC Man after too much wine at lunch – so deeply asleep you are not sure if they are actually dead.

Secondly, there is 19 year old Silka ignoring Foster’s lightning quick reactions for the timely stumping of Yuvraj Singh:

As a Surrey supporter, she’s not shown any interest in England wicket keeping since Alec Stewart retired, so this is not a surprise. To be fair, when Geraint Jones was in the team she wouldn’t even bother being in the house at all.

Finally, a picture of The Australian showing continued indifference to all T20 matches since the demise of his team:

Not only is he ignoring TMS on the radio and Sky on the telly, but he has conspicuously started to demonstrate overtly stereotypical Australian behaviour by preparing the barbie for another shrimp and sporting the Australian national dress of a stupid hat and flipflops. Some would say he was “actively attention seeking”. What is most worrying about this photo is that McFat is clearly being sucked in by this Antipodean trickery.

“This is my cat Harold. Here he is, nonchalantly enjoying a meal. (Don’t question that. Cats can be nonchalant. No-one’s ever questioned a cat’s ability to display indifference.)

“In doing this, he made a choice. He chose to ignore the legacy of Michael Vaughan.

“He’s actually almost sitting on the legacy of Michael Vaughan. He’s very committed in his indifference.”

At this point, we questioned Harold’s awareness of the magazine, but Eva can back up her words.

“Sadly, I can verify his awareness. Later, I found him engrossed in an article about the magic of Kevin Pietersen. It was a calculated betrayal.”

If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicously indifferent to cricket, send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

As I was heading north, I realised that it was the Women’s World Cup final between England and New Zealand. I had just got into the Arctic Circle, in the village of Jukkasjärvi in Sweden and wanted to know the score.

So I thought a hotel would be a good place to find basic information. I went up to this hotel made of ice and knocked.

No one answered. In fact I couldn’t even find a door. It just seemed to be ice rooms with not an internet connection, television or kettle within.

So I continued heading north.

I then came across an Arctic cat and asked him the score. Cats are very wise, especially in the Arctic.

It may be because he spoke Swedish and not English, or most likely because he clearly wasn’t that bothered, but he didn’t help either way. He just continued looking at the ice.

So I continued heading north.

Email your match reports to king@kingcricket.co.uk and remember – strictly no cricket.