Shivnarine Chanderpaul

Out with the old Windies players

The West Indies have dropped Chris Gayle, Ramnaresh Sarwan and Shivnarine Chanderpaul for the first two of five one-day internationals against Pakistan.

Whether this is actually a strong move, we don’t yet know. It depends whether any of them return. The Windies’ coach, Ottis Gibson, has had fairly transparent opinions about these players though. He thinks they don’t really give a shit, which may well be true.

Chanderpaul is pretty old now, so dropping him from the one-day side does make sense. Ramnaresh Sarwan was dropped for a while as an up-the-arse kick, but the anus pain only seemed to spur him to continued mediocrity.

Gayle’s a bit different. He is far and away the most intimidating West Indian batsman and while he certainly appears like he doesn’t give a shit, we’re reluctant to judge, because we know better than anyone that ‘appearing to not give a shit’ and ‘not giving a shit’ are entirely different things.

There’s some interesting stuff about Gayle at WICB Exposé, a site which is fairly self-explanatory if you look at the various categories it boasts: Abuse of Power, Nepotism, Mismanagement, Hypocrisy, Financial Erosion, Dirty Tricks and good, plain old-fashioned Corruption.

As a hilarious footnote to this, we found WICB Exposé by following a link from Lalit Modi’s Twitter account.

Someone’s challenged Shiv to a crease occupation contest

Ashwell Prince’s 262-ball 78 not out effectively said to Shivnarine Chanderpaul: “You think you can bat time? Come on. Let’s see what you’re made of.”

Why would you do that? Shiv has now found himself in a situation where the West Indies are deep into their second innings, only a handful of runs ahead, with bags of time left. If someone could stay with him, he could bat for two whole days and get 61 not out. It would be a thing of rare beauty.

Sadly, Shiv’s best hope was Dwayne Bravo who’s already out. Bravo batted alongside Shiv in the last Test and scored a stunningly grindsome 215-ball 53 – an innings that somewhat ludicrously featured a six at one point. Never one to be outdone, Shiv weighed anchor upon reaching 150 in that match and crawled to 166 off a further 95 balls, as pointed out by Andy Zaltzman in his Confectionery Stall blog for Cricinfo.

Next week, Luke Wright dares Shahid Afridi to renounce shot selection completely.

Two Test batsmen in Twenty20

When you’ve already taken five wickets in a nine over match, as England did, you’d hope to have worse batsmen at the crease than Ramnaresh Sarwan and Shivnarine Chanderpaul. England’s six and seven were James Foster and Graeme Swann, for example.

Needing 10 an over is no cause for panic for Sarwan and Shiv. Most batsmen’s kecks get heavier with every passing delivery with that sort of run rate and overs fast running out. They increasingly try and launch every delivery with all their might. Sarwan and Shiv take the other approach.

You watch Sarwan glance the ball into the legside and think: ‘Well, at least it’s only one.’ But then the ball keeps rolling and gently plods over the boundary with no fielder in sight. He’s only gone and put it where the fielders aren’t. How ingenious.

Lord Megachief of Gold 2008

2007’s Lord Megachief of Gold was Shivnarine Chanderpaul, but who will be given the most exalted title in all of cricket for 2008?

The contenders

Gautam Gambhir came of age as a Test batsman and averaged 70.87 during 2008. Graeme Smith did his things and averaged 72. Ajantha Mendis took his Test wickets at 18 and his one-day international wickets at 10. He also brought us the carrom ball.

Who will it be? Who will be crowned Lord Megachief of Gold 2008?

2008’s Lord Megachief of Gold is…

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Shivnarine Chanderpaul bats and bats and bats

Bat and bat and bat. That was Shivnarine Chanderpaul’s advice to Jerome Taylor last week when the latter got a hundred. Shiv followed his own advice against New Zealand yesterday.

He made 126. He was not out, obviously, because that’s the way Shiv rolls.

Not that Shiv could ever roll. Nothing that angular and unwieldy could ever roll. It’d be like trying to roll a shuriken over a field of jelly. Not any ordinary shuriken either – a shuriken that’d keep trying to wander off to get a batting helmet and pads.

The man’s a machine. An ugly, ugly, physics-defying run machine.

Jerome Taylor somehow hits a Test hundred

Jerome Taylor had a Test average of 13.66 before this match, a first-class average of 12.61 and a top score of 40. Somehow he hit 106 against New Zealand.

After his hundred, Taylor said:

“It was the sort of pitch that, once you got in, it got easier.”

How did he know? Has he ever got in before? As far as he’s concerned all pitches could be like this.

He also revealed the advice that he’d received from Shivnarine Chanderpaul. Shiv said: ‘bat and bat and bat’.

Taylor interpreted this as advice, but it might just as well have been Shiv on autopilot. Some people – like ourself – stare into space and stop thinking as our default mental state. Lord Megachief of Gold merely repeats his mantra and pops the ball about for singles.

Durham’s championship winning batting

Durham’s bowling attack is getting all the attention, but don’t forget that they’ve prepared pitches to suit it and their batsmen have had to bat on those very same tracks.

Not many of Durham’s batsmen have prospered. Most of their 2008 averages aspire to mediocrity. Of Durham players who’ve played more than a couple of games, only four average over 30.

Shivnarine Chanderpaul – 411 runs at 37.36

Shiv’s currently ranked as the best Test batsman in the world. You would hope for runs from him. As Lord Megachief of Gold, you would positively demand them.

Dale Benkenstein – 783 runs at 43.50

Players hit more runs at better averages for other counties, but these runs were more valuable. We move that Dale Benkenstein be nicknamed ‘Benkensteino’ from now on.

Michael Di Venuto – 1,058 runs at 46

No-one else made more than 1,000 runs for Durham. Australian batsmen who aren’t quite good enough for the Test side are so important in county cricket, it’s obscene. We move that Michael Di Venuto be nicknamed ‘Dio Venuto-o’ from now, on the grounds that it’s so catchy and easy to say.

Will Smith – 925 runs at 51.38

Will Smith is perhaps of most interest. He’s scored half of his first-class hundreds (three) this season and we’re not giving much away if we say he’ll be one to watch next season.

Shiv hits some more hundreds

Not many people would be undersold by a title like Lord Megachief of Gold, but Shiv is. If you haven’t been paying attention to the West Indies v Australia Test series – it has been clashing with crucial County Championship division two fixtures after all – you’ll not know how the rickety crab’s been doing.

He’s been doing well.

He hit a hundred in the first Test and he hit an unbeaten hundred in the second Test. The world might be chock-full of things that are frightening and new, but Shiv is Shiv and we can all sleep at nights knowing that’s always going to be the case.

Shivnarine Chanderpaul hits a last ball six to win

This was the perfect example of how great batsmen play the situation. Shivnarine Chanderpaul’s an obdurate Test batsman. He hangs around for hours. In one-day cricket, he’s a different beast. He’s A BEAST OF WRATH. Controlled wrath, but wrath nonetheless.

The West Indies needed ten to win off the last two balls against Sri Lanka yesterday. It didn’t matter that they were nine wickets down, both balls had to exit the field of play. Shiv hit a four and then calmly volleyed a six. Job done.

You don’t get the coveted Lord Megachief of Gold title without being half decent, but Shivnarine Chanderpaul’s continuing to justify his selection.

Chamara Kapugedera had earlier hit a rescue act 95 after Sri Lanka had been 49-5. Kapugedera’s played a few matches, but this is one of the first signs that it might be worth learning his name. Maybe one day ‘Chamara Kapugedera’ will trip off the tongue as easily as ‘Shivnarine Chanderpaul, Lord Megachief of Gold’.

Shivnarine Chanderpaul: Lord Megachief of Gold 2007

He’s got more than his fair share of elbows and knees, but that hasn’t prevented him being given the highest honour in international cricket; the award that the players most respect and yearn for. This year’s Lord Megachief of Gold is Shivnarine Chanderpaul.

England might have spent most of winter watching Kumar Sangakkara and Mahela Jayawardene do their thing, but every match they played against West Indies revolved around this man.

Chanderpaul started the year with 149 not out off 137 balls against India and pretty much took it from there. He averaged 76 in one-day internationals in 2007, hitting four unbeaten hundreds in 20 matches, but it was Test cricket where we spent most time watching him.

The West Indies played England this year and lost 3-0, but that was no fault of Shiv’s. His five innings in the series were 74, 50, 116 not out, 136 not out and 70. In the other Test he’s played this year, against South Africa, he hit 104 and, disappointingly, eight.

We saw that 116 not out at Old Trafford. Much of it was made on a fifth day pitch and in the company of tail-enders and it was an absolute masterpiece. A real, genuine, stand-the-test-of-time, against-the-odds masterpiece. It wasn’t first-day domination on a flat pitch, punishing the bowlers. It was an innings where the conditions, the bowling and the match situation were against him.

When the West Indies lost their last wicket, Shiv shook his head in disappointment. Never mind that he’d played a superlative innings, it was worthless to him. All he’d wanted was to succeed in what would have been a world record run-chase.

Shivnarine Chanderpaul’s the perfect example as to why you shouldn’t think of batsmen as solely one-day players or solely Test players until you’ve seen them in both formats.

If the first time you saw him was in a one-day international, playing the ball over the top and squirting it into ‘unusual areas’, you’d think he’d never make a Test player. You’d say his ‘technique’ was no such thing.

Conversely, if the first time you saw him was in a Test, as he batted for ten hours scoring about one run an over, you’d say he didn’t have the range of shots or the speed of scoring to warrant a place in a one-day side. Just goes to show that the best batsmen are adaptable.

It also shows that sidling around the crease like the Artful Dodger with rickets is no barrier to success.