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Shane Watson throws England’s bowlers

Bowled on 31st July, 2009 at 09:43 by King Cricket
Category: Ashes, Australia cricket news, Shane Watson

Shane Watson's hamstring spontaneously dissolvesYou’ve got to feel for England’s bowlers. How were they supposed to react to Shane Watson?

They prepare themselves for bowling at stubbly-faced munchkin, Phil Hughes, but against all expectation are suddenly confronted with a creepy-looking, gym-bodied albino instead.

It must be like bowling at a fearful ghost. Not the kind that uses its telekinesis to wreak havoc, but one who instead tidies up and puts you on edge by making you wonder what the hell it’s got to look frightened about.

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  1. Reply
    Bert   //   July 31st, 2009 at 11:52

    By the way, King. The following from TMS yesterday:

    Matthew Hayden: “I’ve always thought that momentum is key”

    which nicely brings together your three greatest obsessions in one.

  2. Reply
    Price   //   July 31st, 2009 at 11:57

    Bert

    Dan suggested to the King yestereday that there needs to be some permanant repository during the ahses where we can all share our hayden gems.

    Further evidence that this is essential

    Also, i realise that i havent capitalised haydens name. This demostrates the level of respect i have for the man-ape

  3. Reply
    Bobby K   //   July 31st, 2009 at 12:00

    I just had to send King the following gem

    His opening line on TMS: -

    A little bit of a frown has come over the face of one Matty Hayden who is supporting Australia biasedly

  4. Reply
    King Cricket   //   July 31st, 2009 at 12:43

    He said that? That is awesome.

    We’re working on the Hayden repository and should have something sorted by Monday. It’s not too late then, is it?

    Anyone know if he’s working the next two Tests?

  5. Reply
    Bert   //   July 31st, 2009 at 13:15

    It needs a good name, like The Matthew Hayden Memorial Library of Truth, or something.

  6. Reply
    Bobby K   //   July 31st, 2009 at 13:24

    He did indeed

    i almost choked on my coffee when I heard that!

  7. Reply
    King Cricket   //   July 31st, 2009 at 13:48

    What about simply ‘When Matthew Hayden executes his speaking skills’?

  8. Reply
    King Cricket   //   July 31st, 2009 at 13:50

    Or ‘The Matthew Hayden Guff Repository est. 2009′.

  9. Reply
    Ed   //   July 31st, 2009 at 14:18

    I see Boycs and shitface Hayden have had a spat in the TMS box!

  10. Reply
    Bert   //   July 31st, 2009 at 14:53

    He said Boycott’s batting style “emptied cricket grounds” and Boycott walked out of the commentary box with “I don’t need comments like that at my stage.”

    Each in their own way, they’re both annoying twats.

  11. Reply
    Dave   //   July 31st, 2009 at 17:39

    Don’t mention ghosts to Watson!

  12. Reply
    GED   //   August 1st, 2009 at 15:51

    THE MATTHEW HAYDEN BIBLE

    …….should be the title.

  13. Reply
    Axiom   //   August 2nd, 2009 at 10:46

    boycs should’ve given haydos a serve

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