Worcestershire sign Avatar director, James Cameron

James Cameron looks forward to pre-season trainingAn exodus of playing staff has led Worcestershire to make some unusual signings. Their latest recruit is 55-year-old Canadian, James Cameron, who recently directed the hugely successful film, Avatar.

“I have always dreamed of being a professional cricketer and I am thrilled to take up this opportunity with Worcestershire.”

Cameron only bothers making a film about once every five years or so, so he should have plenty of time to work on his gentle outswingers.

Suggestions that the film director’s multi-million dollar wealth will create ructions in the changing rooms have been rubbished by the playing staff, including by batsman, Ben Smith:

“He may have amassed a sizable personal fortune through creating the two most successful films of all time, Titanic and Avatar, but we’ve dealt with these problems before.

“Last year, Alan Richardson got his loft converted and those skylights aren’t cheap, you know. But there was no jealousy from the other players. We just got on with it.”

Richardson himself concurs:

“He’s just an ordinary bloke. For every Titanic and Avatar, there’s been something relatively unsuccessful, such as Aliens, Terminator or, er, Terminator 2…”

It seems that so long as James Cameron gets his share of runs and chips in with a few tight overs, he will be welcome at New Road.

Incidentally, if anyone tells you that it is in fact a different James Cameron who Worcestershire have signed – one born in Zimbabwe, say – if anyone tells you that, just deck them.

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14 Appeals

  1. So Worcestershire have signed James Cameron, but they haven’t signed James Cameron.

    KC, are you telling True Lies?

  2. Avatar is rubbish.

  3. This is just rubbish. Why would Ben Smith be talking about Alan Richardson’s loft conversion? Richardson only moved from Middlesex at the end of the 2009 season. He’s never been in the Worcestershire dressing room. This makes no sense. Please get your facts right.

  4. King Cricket

    January 27, 2010 at 12:05 pm

    It was converted during the autumn. Why would you have major renovations carried out during the season? That would be mental.

    Smith is highlighting the fact that wealthy newcomers are embraced by the players.

  5. Will James Cameron bowl in 3D or just the regular Worcestershire 2D stuff?

  6. I’d read on Cricinfo that Alan Richardson couldn’t get building control approval for his plans for a loft conversion, because there wasn’t sufficient headroom above the stairway. Are you saying that he’s gone ahead and done it anyway? There were some rumours at the time that it was a problem with the local authority planning department that necessitated him leaving the Middlesex area in the first place.

  7. Damn! I had bookmarked that link from cricinfo and was planning to write my first satirical piece…..:)

  8. I am so happy someone else thinks Avatar is rubbish. Over-rated. Is it really as successful as Titanic?

  9. I vehemently resent the inference that it is difficult to get planning permission in Middlesex.

    Do you really think that the burghers of Barnt Green (or Bury for that matter) are any more accommodating than those of Barnet and Brent?

    I would be incandescent with rage, except that incandescent bulbs are no longer available around here (bloody council), so I am fluorescent with rage.

    Doesn’t have the same impact, fuorescence with rage, does it?

  10. I’ve read and re-read this post KC, and I have to say I’m not 100% convinced about the veracity of some of those quotes.

  11. Well why else would he move, Ged? What possible other cause could there be? Eh? C’mon, if you’ve got all the answers.

  12. Oh big deal, Nottinghamshire have the supercool Will SMith! and Middlesex have ex-Take That singer Robbie Williams!

  13. Yeh, who needs Big Al going on about Stoke City all the time when you’ve got Robbie Williams in yer squad?

  14. Avatar is both as succesful and as rubbish as Titanic.

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