Napier groundsman in saying New Zealand batsmen are shit SHOCKER

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< 1 minute read

Napier groundsman Phil Stoyanoff was asked if there will be a result in the current Test between New Zealand and Pakistan:

“Yes, because both sides have such bad batsmen. That’s my honest opinion, they’re useless.”

As this might be considered a bit inflammatory, New Zealand Cricket public affairs manager Stephen Hill said to the media:

“Ideally it would be nice if you didn’t use [the quote] but I recognise that is not going to happen, so I hope you use it in context and use it with restraint.”

We’re pretty sure we’ve fulfilled that brief.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?


  1. I don’t think this was an invitation to the gutter press to fill their boots.


  2. Pakistan haven’t let the curator down. Now hopefully Newzealand will make amends for their solid showing today by edging regulation straight balls to slips. They are really talented in that.

  3. Well I guess he is true, the way Pakistani batsman batted you can easily call it shit or more, NZ openers looking solid till now but what is coming up is mystery ;P

  4. I couldn’t work out if that was a real name. It’s sounds like it should be a joke, does Phil Stoyanoff. Like Phil McCavity or somesuch. So I looked it up on google to see if it was at all common. Imagine my surprise at learning that Stoyanoff is the surname of a popular lingerie model, with pictures to back this up. Stalking really is something that should not be done in the office.

  5. Unless you are stalking someone in the office, in which case it just makes life easier.

    That’s what i find.

  6. Wise words all round.

    We’d also add that if you do your stalking in the office, it counts as work and therefore isn’t illegal.

  7. This blog doesn’t count as the press, does it?

    I’m looking forward to the Pakistan team going to Oz. More games need spectacular batting collapses and the Aussies can provide some decent competition in that area.

  8. Well, the video is certainly easy on the eye. Although the best bit came towards the end when he says ‘Nobody cares baby’. Quite.

    Sorry KC, you’re probably right to do it. It’s just if I were to play a word association game with ‘twitter’ i’d think ‘wanker’.

    Everything evolves but maybe i’ve reached my interactive ceiling.

  9. It’s replacing a really awkwardly positioned advert – look at it that way.

    We’ll see how it goes. If people want us to remove it, we will.

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