2 minute read Here’s a moment from the final scene when Geoff finds himself surrounded by a gang of maize. Okay, we’ll admit that’s a lie. Boycott’s Triffids film is being kept closely under wraps and they would never give away crucial plot information like this. The photo is actually from a press
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Testing on cricketers
< 1 minute read Animal testing facilities have recently taken to using cricketers in place of guinea pigs, mice and the like. They make them joust and then the loser gets his leg taken off. Don’t ask why.
Continue readingWarney finds the ball
< 1 minute read “Here it is!” “It was tucked between two of my rolls of flab.”
Continue readingEveryone suddenly becomes aware that the stumps are liable to explode
< 1 minute read No-one was quite sure what it was, but everyone agreed that it was very clear that the stumps suddenly seemed like they were going to explode. Billy Bowden backed away. Monty Panesar attempted to protect himself with his oversized hands and AB de Villiers just threw himself to the ground.
Continue readingAlways watch the ball
< 1 minute read On no account stand six feet away from the stumps and watch the blimp instead. Canny bowlers will take advantage.
Continue readingAndrew Strauss miscomprehends Law 41.3
< 1 minute read The batting side only gets five penalty runs added to their total when the ball hits a helmet belonging to the fielding side. You can’t just repeatedly play the ball into your own face and hope to win a match.
Continue readingIan Bell attempts to grow a beard
< 1 minute read Sam writes: “Here is a picture of Ian Bell attempting to grow a little beard. “Look at the concentration on his face. It’s dedication like this that shows just how far English cricket has come.” We asked Sam if he had a beard. Sam never got back to us about
Continue readingStanford 20/20 gimmicks
< 1 minute read It was only a matter of time before they introduce BIGGER and therefore BETTER balls. But the Miami Vice style attire? That’s a step too far.
Continue readingIndia practice ‘clown tactics’
< 1 minute read “So I curl up behind him like this and then you give him a shove.” India’s clown tactics were all well and good in theory, but when it came to carrying them out with an actual batsman present, everyone got confused and Sourav Ganguly ended up with a black eye.
Continue readingAndrew Flintoff unveils his big surprise
< 1 minute read “Voila!” Brilliant, Fred. It’s a cricket ball. We’ve all seen a cricket ball before. What’s next in your box of tricks? A bat? A box?
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