Of course Craig Kieswetter’s in the England one-day team

He's in whites! Get him in the Test team!

The BBC go with ‘Craig Kieswetter keeps England one-day spot’. Cricinfo have got ‘Craig Kieswetter and Ian Bell earn ODI calls’.

In what world is this news? Craig Kieswetter hit a hundred in his last one-day international and was man of the match in his last Twenty20 international – the World Twenty20 final. Why wouldn’t he be in the England squad? If it’s about how he’s playing as a wicketkeeper then surely the headline’s ‘Prior dropped’.

Clearly it isn’t that. Clearly it’s just part of a wider trend where everyone in the media suddenly wants to bum Craig Kieswetter. We’ve made our strong views about Craig Kieswetter well known.

“Craig Kieswetter’s unstoppable march” isn’t a story; it’s something that can be painted as a story because it’s half the Kevin Pietersen story and half the same old ‘pressure on the England wicketkeeper’ story. Actually, that’s not fair – there’s probably a bit of ‘the new Adam Gilchrist’ in there too.

The point is, this isn’t a story in its own right, it’s a story collage – photocopies of other stories all pasted together so that they look like something – possibly a marmot.

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12 Appeals

  1. Surely the big news is that Samit Patel isn’t in the squad?

  2. It’s because there is no real surprise other than perhaps Bell being recalled and Yardy favoured over Bopara and/or Shazad. And they were all pretty debatable anyway.

  3. Samit Fatel looked very large on TV this afternoon. Not Mark Cosgrove large but large nonetheless.

  4. To be fair to him, there are quite a few top class eateries in and around Nottingham. I particularly recommend Maryland Chicken if you don’t mind the jibes about your weight and a decreased chance of national selection that inevitably follow.

  5. Samit Patel needs to read this article :- Washington, June 3 (ANI): A new American research on appetite stimulants for hibernating marmots could help understand obesity.

  6. Couldn’t remember what a marmot looks like, so looked up this:

    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7e/Marmot_princeton.JPG

    Cute!

    Then couldn’t remember what marmot’s are, so went here:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marmot

    I especially like the fact that they are groundhogs and that Alaska now calls “groundhog day” “marmot day” to distinguish it from that wonderful movie.

    Very appropo to the media groundhog day described, KC. Is that post-modern or post-post-modern?

  7. Can’t believe the errant apostrophe in “marmot’s” there – I’ll get my coat.

  8. Nottingham is one of the few international locations of the infamous “Hooters” franchise. Synonymous for it’s burgers and fries served by bootalicious babes in vests and orange hotpants.

    I first experienced “Hooters” in the gargantuan Edmonton Mall, that’s Edmonton, Alberta not the North London Alabanian enclave. I was hugely disappointed at the quality of totty who had more in the wrong places than our FATTY SAMMY. Personnally I am a Pret man now myself.

  9. Ged- I love that bit where he punches that guy right in the face. Brilliant!

  10. @ Andy
    One of my Indian work colleagues (recently arrived in Nottingam) took his wife and children to Hooters thinking it was an owl-themed eating establishment…

  11. Why on earth would he take them to a place like that?

    If a woman feeds her husband roasted owl, he will become completely subservient to her every wish. Words to this effect appear on hundreds of folk wisdom web sites although none has any information about the source.

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