Duncan Fletcher’s crappy book

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Turns out I was right about everything - Duncan FletcherIt is if the extracts are anything to go by.

Duncan Fletcher’s book is called ‘Behind The Shades‘ – a reference to his inscrutable public appearance. Fletcher didn’t care what the media said about him and he didn’t have a lot to say to them.

Well, it turns out that he did have a lot to say and he was bottling it all up ready for a massively juvenile autobiography. We’ve always held Fletcher in high regard for what he achieved, but the extracts from this book that have been appearing in The Daily Mail seem designed to strip away any dignity he had or any respect he earned.

If we could sum up Fletcher’s words, without reference to any specific incident, it would be as follows:

  • Dropping this player was wrong. You thought it was my decision, but it wasn’t.
  • You said omitting this player was wrong, but it wasn’t. And even if it was wrong, it wasn’t my decision, but it wasn’t wrong and mostly it was my decision.
  • So-and-so said I was a dick, but I didn’t even do anything, so who’s the dick, eh? It’s him. He’s the dick.
  • So-and-so once said something critical about me, so I decided I would never speak to him again. Then I shouted at him.
  • I was pretty much always right.

The overall tone is of a child being asked why they’d done something wrong and going: ‘Actually, actually, it wasn’t me, actually. Because actually…’ and then desperately reworking the facts to put themselves in a good light.

It also would appear that Fletcher thinks a discussion about selection can be dealt with by naming your preferred choice to England’s captain and chairman of selectors before walking away without another word and ignoring them when they try to call you back to actually talk about it.

We agree with him about Beefy though.

DON'T BE LIKE GATT!

Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.

Coincidence?

Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?

10 comments

  1. I love this…

    Beefy’s brain has obviously been stewed in red wine for far too long.

    The man is a cricketing legend, alas, as a commentator he’s a c*nt.

  2. Damn wrong post.

    Ah well the sentiments are the same…

    Also, Duncan Fletcher=Arse.

    What a stubborn old mule…

    Can you imagine having a conversation over dinner with this man? No, I thought not. THe man is a bore, and may even be a boor (but hey, I’ve never actually met him),.

    And thank you very much sire, for introducing that shocking image of beefy and dunc, getting on.

    I imagine i’ll need counselling to rid myself of that foul image,

    Bastard.

  3. Does this man ever want to work again? I realise that any newspaper which buys serialisation rights is only going to print the juciest bits, and somewhat out of context, but even still……

    The bit about Trescothick was horrible and unnecessary, whilst today’s whining about selection comes across as just plain pathetic.

    My understanding of the book in one line: “It wasn’t me, and he did it too.”

    Plus, I feel a bit grubby after even going onto the Daily Mail website. And now I need a wire wool and dettol brain scrub having read the post below.

    So overall: Duncan Fletcher’s book = Yeuch.

  4. I also love the bit from today’s paper..

    I was right to drop Monty Panesar for the 1st Ashes test, because he had no Arm Ball….

    WHAT!!! So play Ashley Giles, who ONLY has an arm ball?!

    Although he was right, obviously. He always is. And that’s it. If you say he’s wrong, you’re wrong. He’s right, right!

  5. Nothing wrong with only having an arm ball. It hasn’t done Daniel Vettori’s career any harm, anyway.

  6. All other things aside, the writing is absolute dreck. It sounds like a policeman giving evidence at a trial:

    ======
    He got up and walked outside in full view of all the Indian side and their officials.

    “No, no, Tres, you’ve got to get back inside,” I said anxiously.

    He was embarrassing himself by going outside.

    I had decided he must go home even before he came off after being bowled by Brett Lee for eight and broke down again.

    I had a migraine soon afterwards and had to lie down.
    ======

    The similarities to a young child increase…

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