Duncan Fletcher, India coach

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Duncan Fletcher can bring a sour face to the roleSounds wrong, but we’re going to have to get used to it.

Some believe that Fletcher got this job because of the brilliant work he did with England (and yes, overall it was brilliant), but we suspect it was more that India wanted somebody jowelly and unfriendly on their staff and it just happened to be that they had an opening as head coach. If the kit washer had retired, they’d have simply recruited someone who fitted the description in that role instead.

This could lead to a cracking chapter in the next edition of Duncan Fletcher’s crappy book.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?


  1. I wonder whether Duncan Fletcher will do for Indian ODI cricket what he did for England’s?

    1. That was one of our first thoughts. Odd selection for a nation where one-dayers are so important.

      Maybe they just assume that no-one could ever fix England’s one-day woes and didn’t hold his record against him. Fair assumption.

    1. He brings far more than jowls and sunglasses to a team.

      He also brings broad-brimmed hats.

  2. At first this struck me as a little bizarre. Fletcher has more in common with Greg Chappell than Gary Kirsten. Then I realized Dhoni is no Ganguly, so it might work after all. But I still don’t get why they didn’t go for someone who could smile a bit once in a while.

  3. Oh man. We are screwed. What the fuck was BCCI thinking? I fear Chappel like shenanigans now. Thankfully the contract is only for 2 years.

  4. Please use his full title (St. Duncan of Fletcher, Replacer of Bumble, Smiter-In-Chief of Australians, Creator of the Unstoppable Destroyer That Was Freddy c.2004-2005, Albeit With Not Inconsiderable Help From Troy Cooley, Loyal Friend of Geraint, Sworn Enemy of Chris, Grand Irritator of Ricky, For Which We Are Eternally Grateful, Employer of A Thousand Analysts, Winner of a UK Passport But Eventual Loser of the Plot, OBE) in future.

  5. I believe Fletcher had worked with Gary Kirsten, Paddy Upton and Eric Simmons for the Cape Town University team in early nineties. I think it is a vote for continuity by the BCCI

  6. KC, one dayers are not “important” in India. The world cup is important, but random bilateral ODIs not nearly so. As long as he is able to groom worthy replacements for Tendulkar, Dravid and Laxman, and find a couple of decent fast bowlers for the test team, nobody gives a flying fuck what Fletcher does to India’s ODI ranking.

    I realized we are screwed even as I was typing this. Find replacements for the middle order? Discover new fast bowlers, and maybe a leg spinner? India will be the new Australia.

    1. It’s a poisoned chalice isn’t it?

      “Your job, should you choose to accept it, is to find replacements for Tendulkar, Dravid and Laxman.”

      “Yeeeeeaaaah, think I’ll give that one a miss, actually. I’ll go for the New Zealand job where I’ve at least a fighting chance of finding the next Kyle Mills.”

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