Mitchell Johnson and Stuart Clark reveal the extent of institutionalised avian molestation in Australia

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“It’s interesting to see each other’s balls.”

So said Mitchell Johnson this week.

Apparently the Aussies have been discovering that the balls in England aren’t like the ones they’re used to back home.

Stuart Clark explained further:

“I think it’s just we’ve grown up playing with Kookaburras for so long that it takes a little bit of time to get used to their balls.”

But get used to them they will.


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  1. Shame on you! KC. Slandering those innocent Aussie lads!

    Just because Poms can’t keep their hands out of their pants.

  2. I think the healthy levels of inneuendo within this post should curb any of this serious cricket chat that has been infesting this website of late.

  3. Yeah, here’s to avian fiddling in all it’s glory.

    I’m now putting on my peacock suit, and making my way to Leicester in the hope of some shiny ball action.

  4. Suave, far be it from me to suggest that you’d look a bit of a ‘cock in that outfit…

    Besides which, I thought it was Umar Gul who was fiddling with his balls?

  5. Lucky Dickie has stopped umpiring otherwise Mitchell would have given him more than his sweater to hold …

  6. He’s right, Kookaburras have the best balls of all. Dunno about Mitch, though, if we’re going to get into the discussion of whether anyone on the Aussie team actually has any balls.

  7. Am quite inured now to cricketers constantly adjusting themselves (not just cricketers to be truthful, seems to be a constant fear of the modern man that his parts are in imminent danger of falling off and need reassurance and re-arranging) but can’t cope with all the gobbing – thought this was the specialist area of footballers.

    Even saw the lovely Kumar spit today – though he did it most gracefully with his head quite still

  8. Man
    Gobbing (I had to check your spelling on this one)

    Something on your mind, Ceci?

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