Kent want Stuart Clark fit and firing for the Ashes

Stuart Clark's lifetime ambition is to play for Kent for six weeksWhy else would Kent sign Stuart Clark other than to help him recover from injury and to help him get a few overs under his belt in English conditions? It’s perfect. How delightfully accommodating of them.

In the unlikely event that Kent come up against an England batsman in those first few weeks of the season, maybe they could do some extensive analysis of defects in said batsman’s technique and feed them to Clark for use in that vital County Championship fixture.

They could even make a polite request that he doesn’t share that information with any of his Aussie team mates. He’s a good sport. He’d honour a gentlemen’s agreement.

Alternatively, they could make him bowl 45 overs a day while he’s with them and then tell him that there’s A REAL DRAGON in Wales just before he sets off for the first Test.

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8 Appeals

  1. This isn’t an appeal to this article but I have noticed that Michael Clarke seems to hate to get more runs than Ponting.

    It has happened again today.

  2. I like your plan, KC. It’s fiendish in a proper Dick Dastardly way. It says, why let the Aussies control their players in the run up to the Ashes. We can do a much better job. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Haaa haaa haaa.

    As a small modification, we could have Key give him one over in the middle of the afternoon of his first match, replace him with a part-time medium pacer, and not let him bowl again for the rest of the six weeks. The psychological damage would be immense. By the time the six weeks is up, he’ll have all the confidence of an English player.

  3. this is ridiculous.
    i can’t believe this is happening.
    middlesex have signed hughes as well.

    english cricket really does shoot itself in the arsehole sometimes.

    you have to wonder what key would think if he was playing for england.

  4. Oh come on,surely the boys are men enough not to be phased by it. So it was ok for Monty to go and train in subcontinent prior to India tour,was it ?
    Away from this blog KC, you have made no mention of England ladies in the world cup.
    They seem to be doing ok !

  5. England’s women are talented, committed and brilliant.

    They don’t make good subject matter.

  6. They are a lot prettier than likes of Shrek and they win matches as well.

  7. Aussies playing County cricket before the Ashes will also give the England Test players the chance to have a look at them. You Poms love seeing the half of the glass that’s empty.

  8. Fred Grace, England’s test players will be sealed in a windowless vault for the next few months to ensure they avoid injury or any contact with the outside world that might hurt their feelings.

    I’m sure that Clark and Hughes will suffer the full force of the county championship and its examination of technique. A few medium pace dibbly-dobblers will soon sort them out.

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