Stanley being conspicuously indifferent to the Ashes

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If you’ve got a picture of an animal being conspicuously indifferent to cricket, send it to king@kingcricket.co.uk.

Tom sent us this, along with a decidedly minimalist explanation. He informed us that Stanley is called Stanley and that the Ashes cricket that can be seen on the TV is the Ashes.

Of those two facts, Stanley’s name is the only one we could not have deduced.

Stanley’s indifference to cricket is actually even greater than you might initially suppose. With Jonny Bairstow and Moeen Ali at the crease, it was pretty much guaranteed that there was going to be a wicket at any moment – and still Stanley ignores it.

Both Moeen and Bairstow were indeed dismissed without adding a run.

Not that Stanley gives a shit.

DON'T BE LIKE GATT!

Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.

Coincidence?

Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?

8 comments

  1. I may have yelped in joy in the middle of a pub at my cricket-indifferent girlfriend that ABCITC was back.

    Which is more than Stanley would ever done, of course.

      1. This photo works on two levels. Stanley showing conspicuous indifference to Moeen, showing conspicuous indifference to a ball about to hit middle stump.

      2. I’ve never played “The Stanley Parable,” but I’d like to think it merely offers this image for silent contemplation until the quit keys are pressed.

  2. Not sure if anyone’s keeping track of the T20 international quadrangular series going on in the Netherlands, but so far Thailand have
    – thrashed Scotland by 74 runs (Thailand 129/3 with opener Nattakan Chantam scoring 60* off 49 balls and wicket-keeper Nannapat Koncharoenkai 33 off 35 batting at No. 3; Scotland 55 ao from 15.4 overs with off-spinner Onnicha Kamchomphu taking 4/8 from 3 overs),
    – beaten Ireland by 4 runs in a 10-over weather-affected match (Thailand 54/4 with Nannapat Koncharoenkai top-scoring with 18 off 15 balls, then snaring two catches and a stumping as Ireland stumbled to 50/7; all-rounder Nattaya Boochatham took 3/18 and Ratanaporn Padunglerd 2/6 from their 2 overs apiece, Chanida Sutthiruang supporting with a very economical 2-0-4-1),
    – cruised to an 8 wicket victory against the Netherlands (Netherlands 54 ao from 17.5 overs, with Nattaya Boochatham taking 3/3 off 2.5 overs, Onnicha Kamchomphu taking 2/10 off 4 overs, and Nannapat Koncharoenkai getting another two catches and a stumping; Thailand 55/2 from 8 overs thanks to a bat-carrying 42* off 31 balls by Nattakan Chantam).

    Thailand therefore lead the Quadrangular table, ahead of Scotland, Ireland and the Netherlands – the hosts sadly winless. Despite the reduced 10-over match against Ireland and the short run-chase against the Netherlands, Nattakan Chantam’s is the tournament’s leading run-scorer with 110 (Nannapat Koncharoenkai is 5th in the standings with 51). With only one dismissal, this means Chantam’s average of 110 is also the tournament’s best (Koncharoenkai again ranks 5th and Nattaya Boochatham 6th). Boochatham and Onnicha Kamchomphu both have six wickets so form two parts of a three-way tie for leading wicket-taker, and together lead the tournament strike rate table (taking wickets every 6.8 and 7.0 balls respectively). Medium-pacer Ratanaporn Padunglerd has the tournament’s most maidens (two) and best economy rate (2.33 across 6 overs), with Thailand taking 4 of the top 7 places (Kamchomphu’s 2.57 across 7 overs is 2nd, Chanida Sutthiruang’s 3.50 across 6 overs is 5th and Sornnarin Tippoch’s 3.71 across 7 overs is 7th). There’s a Thai 1-2-3 for the tournament’s best bowling averages (Kamchomphu 6 @ 3.00, Padunglerd 3 @ 4.66, Boochatham 6 @ 4.83) and together these three have five of the top seven innings bowling figures, with the top two being Kamchomphu’s 4/8 vs Scotland and Boochatham’s 3/3 vs Netherlands. Koncharoenkai has six dismissals (four caught, two stumped) to rank as the tournament’s leading wicket-keeper. On the subject of “only being selected for your fielding”, Soraya Lateh has neither batted nor bowled but is the tournament’s leading out-fielder with 4 catches including three in one match against Scotland (no other out-fielder in this tournament has totalled more than one catch). Thailand have conceded a total of just three in byes/leg byes over the three matches (best in the tournament and less than half of the next-best team), and twelve in no balls/wides (best in tournament), so are overall the side that’s stingiest with extras. They don’t top every statistical table – the Chantam/Koncharoenkai partnership of 52 runs against Scotland is only the tournament’s second-highest. But overall, what a performance, especially with the ball! No wonder their opponents have been tied down.

    I know Thailand play most of their cricket against weaker opposition in Asia, but 21 year-old Onnicha Kamchomphu’s T20I career has so far taken in 23 matches, her offbreaks claiming 18 wickets at an average of 5.33 (in words: FIVE POINT THREE THREE, this is not a typo!), best figures of 4/6 (against Bhutan), an economy rate of 3.03 runs per over, and a strike rate of a wicket every 10.5 balls. Her batting average is 4.6 from 7 innings at a strike rate of 109, which I also like.

    Nattaya Boochatham, listed as “right-arm medium-fast” by Cricinfo, has taken 36 wickets at 7.02 in 25 matches (though she’s 32 now so must have played many matches before which didn’t get official T20I status), with best figures of 4/3 (against Hong Kong), economy 3.18 and strike rate 13.2. She bats towards the top of the order too: this tournament is the first time she hasn’t come in at first-down, dropping to number 4 or 5, with a career average of 17.5 and top score 56 (against Indonesia). Her strike rate of 70.7 is rather more sedate, though.

    My favourite Thai player is Wongpaka Liengprasert who I have written about here before (after she took 5/12 with her off-spin to help her side beat Sri Lanka at the 2018 Asia Cup, she’s always the first name I look for on the scorecard) but she’s had a quiet tournament with no wickets so far and wasn’t even bowled against Ireland.

    Such a shame their men’s team aren’t as good as the women, bet the Barmy Army would love to add the country to the Winter tour itinerary! The under-50s among them should seriously consider donating to a Thai cricket development fund. There’s a slim but plausible chance in the next two decades of England playing a match in Thailand before they ever set foot in Afghanistan…

  3. Today is the 100th anniversary of my dad’s birth. I have written a short tribute piece (embedded within the following) and also a link to the MTWD match report I wrote about the day that turned out to be his last birthday – Day Four of a cracking county championship match at Lord’s:

    http://ianlouisharris.com/2006/08/11/dads-last-birthday-a-day-at-lords-11-august-2006/

    The grumpy old members’ reaction to my non-cricketing parents in the Long Room is a classic piece of Lordsmanship, if you are willing to wade through a match report that does also describe the cricket.

    An array of interesting names (in a 2019 context) involved in that match too.

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