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Graeme Smith and Neil McKenzie set world record opening partnership

Bowled on 1st March, 2008 at 08:48 by King Cricket
Category: Bangladesh, Graeme Smith, Neil McKenzie, Records, South Africa

Smith and McKenzie - 'partners'Opening partnerships are the most boring kinds of batting partnership – especially if it’s the first innings. There’s no context to the innings and you’re removing any doubt about the rest of the game. Let’s face it, after 415 runs without a wicket, it’s either going to be a South African win or a draw.

We admire it in for its cold remorselessness. We like players who don’t let the opposition have a sniff. But as records go, it’s not one of our favourites.

Must be a bit of a confidence booster though. Next innings, Smith and McKenzie can look at each other as they go out to bat and they can think to themselves: ‘We can bat for bloody ages together.’

Then McKenzie can think: ‘Smithy’s so strong’. And Smith can think: ‘McKenzie’s cover-driving’s dreamy.’ Then the pair of them will just drop their bats, discard their batting helmets and kiss.

Graeme Smith’s leg will bend at the knee and come up behind him.

This film features marines using the bannister when they go down some stairs. What more could you want?

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  1. Reply
    Miriam   //   March 1st, 2008 at 09:55

    it’s all very well you trying to distract us with the bromance, but Bangladesh are hurting.

  2. Reply
    Ceci   //   March 1st, 2008 at 10:33

    You’d think the fathead Kallis would come to the party and whack a few then wouldn’t you? Nope – 39 off 120.

  3. Reply
    Dave   //   March 1st, 2008 at 14:14

    I could have scored a hundred on that pitch, standing on one leg. I think we can consider both Smith and McKenzie’s failure to achieve 300 a most dismal failure.

    Dale Steyn is starting to frighten me, though.

  4. Reply
    Jonah   //   March 1st, 2008 at 14:45

    How can such simple words conjure up such horrifying mental images?

  5. Reply
    Suave   //   March 2nd, 2008 at 17:49

    Egads man…What is this!!

    Some bastard blogging nightmare, to get thoughts of dirty Saffers having sex stuck in my brain forever.

    Cricket with Balls is piping on about Jacques Kallis thinking that he’s a love god, and now you with this man love opening partnership.

    I feel dirty.

  6. Reply
    mark   //   March 3rd, 2008 at 04:22

    if mckenzie is the best opener we have then god help us. he is just the most tedious batsman to watch. and he’s bloody ancient.

  7. Reply
    King Cricket   //   March 3rd, 2008 at 08:50

    You are dirty, Suave.

    More boring than Kallis, Mark?

  8. Reply
    Suave   //   March 3rd, 2008 at 09:00

    Rumbled again.

    No one is more boring than Kallis, surely?

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