Jesse Ryder, you really do appear in the most spectacularly glorious stories.
Jesse Ryder injured himself while he was out drinking to celebrate New Zealand’s one-day series win over England. Did he injure himself in a fight? No. Did he injure himself trying to break into a toilet? Yes.
He’s gashed his hand punching through a pane of glass, by the sounds of it. It’s all a little opaque.
New Zealand’s manager, Lindsay Crocker, said: “It was one of those semi-detached toilets with the lock on the outside. There was no one in there and there was a little glass panel next to it and he put his hand through it – quite forcibly, obviously – to unlock it, and that is when he did the damage.”
Semi-detached toilets? What?