World Cup heroes finally selected

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The England camp has been struck by a few cases of the wild shits this week. This might not seem that interesting in itself, but it has allowed us to answer one important question.

Is Luke Wright a batsman, a bowler or simply a blank canvas who doesn’t get injured? Apparently, he’s none of those. He’s actually a blank canvas who doesn’t get the wild shits.

James Tredwell is playing too and the West Indies have dropped Shiv.

An England win is all but guaranteed.


  1. 5/134 – The nice men in the white coats have come and put a screen around the horse so as not to frighten the children.

  2. Pah your pessimism Mr Wolf. 160/6 and Wright and Treadwell are at the crease.

    An England win is all but guaranteed.

    Although, this does of course mean there is a danger of complacency…

  3. – Wright plays a sensible innings with England in trouble to give them a slim chance of winning.

    – Tredwell takes the first three Windies wickets with everyone else being slogged around the park.

    Am I in a parrallel universe?

  4. Alphamonkey – yes I we all are. Ravi Bopara is now taking wickets at the World Cup.

    England really have been ridiculous at this World Cup. I don’t care if they get knocked out. I have been entertained.

    Shits-and-giggles cricket is surely the way forward.

  5. I’m not sure which is least believable:

    1. Bopara getting picked.
    2. Bopara being trusted to bowl.
    3. Bopara being trusted to bowl IN A POWERPLAY
    4. 4 overs, 2 for 4 runs.

    1. Apologies Your Majesty – I thought he was in your list of heroes.

      I think the only way that this game could be anymore exciting was if I was watching it on Ceefax.

  6. I really didn’t appreciate the shits reference, KC. I have only just removed my brown trousers and put on some more sartorially elegant troos.

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