How England win Test matches

Nice leaveBasically, through ambush.

They plod along, being solid and unspectacular and then in one innings in the field, they completely steamroller the opposition.

Think of England’s wins since Andy Flower and Andrew Strauss took over. West Indies were rolled for 152 at Lord’s; the same opponents were dispatched for 176 at Chester-le-Street; Australia 215 at Lord’s and 160 at The Oval; and now South Africa are in more than a bit of strife at 76-6.

It’s blunt, sudden and totally excessive. It’s like England are ambling around town for the afternoon, doing a bit of shopping, when suddenly they call in an airstrike on Poundland and make off with the products that remain.

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7 Appeals

  1. I would like to point out that Ian Bell is rather good and that anyone sometimes leaves a straight one.

  2. lovely bowling from broad and swann today.

    i went to the pub for lunch and saw three and a half wickets in 45 minutes.

    can’t ask for more than that.

    the reason it was three and a half is because we only caught the replay of the kallis dismissal.

    when duminy was bowled i shouted and almost choked on my cheese and pickle sandwich.

  3. are you related to Jacques Kallis by any chance, Jaques?

    Just asking.

  4. oh ..and by the way, Kallis does the ‘Bell’ very well.
    Duminy is yet to perfect it though

  5. Me and my Mrs are like England I like to amble round town while she does the raiding.

  6. AB wanted to do a Bell, but couldn’t quite manage it.

    Duminy’s ‘bowled’ is a misnomer if I’ve ever heard one. He knocked the ball onto his own stumps from about shoulder height. Shit, it was funny to watch.

    Almost as funny/painful as watching Twatto creep on all fours with plenty of pauses for deep breathing through the undergrowth of his brain towards the unthinkable ton. Now that really was funny if long-winded.

    The Aussies used to be relatively sane, now they appear to be all mad/nervous wrecks and they have taken the Saffers with them.

    Duminy’s reputation is in tatters and he looks disorientated when he comes out to bat. Never a good sign.

  7. I’m delighted to report that I managed to see 3.5 wickets today (using sam’s counting system) which is not bad out of 4 especially as I was on the move this morning.

    But I did catch the first one before I left and the referral for the second one when I arrived at the gym. Then saw the last two wickets while exercising, the last of which came just at the point that I was starting to think “I really must get off this machine in a minute or else I might be late for my meeting”.

    Too much information, I know, I know, but great timing, England. And a great win.

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