NEW OBSESSION: Danny Morrison commentary
We haven’t had a weird obsession with a trivial element of cricket in ages. Luckily Danny Morrison’s bizarrely beguiling intonation has stepped into the breach.
Hanging on his every word
We don’t dislike Danny Morrison, but he’s not a good commentator. Despite this, we find ourself listening to him far more closely than any other IPL commentator. This is because we’re fascinated with his halting, percussive speech patterns. We wrote about a fairly typical piece of Danny Morrison commentary last week. He basically talks in unrelated bullet points.
But the staccato delivery’s not even half of it. His commentary’s weirder still when he draws out his sentences to give added emphasis. What he’s actually saying pretty much never warrants that emphasis, so you find yourself in a constant state of puzzlement.
Pay attention: significant plot development
The best way we can describe it is that it’s as if Morrison is narrating the match, rather than commentating on it. What we mean by this is that he describes a leg-bye as if he KNOWS that this is a match-turning event; as if he’s already privy to what’s going to happen later on and is giving you hints.
There are only two ways to react:
- Be absolutely baffled as to why this is a significant moment
- Be absolutely baffled as to why Danny Morrison feels it necessary to make this seem like a significant moment
Why does he do this?
Our guess is that he feels obliged to make every on-field event sound momentous. By applying an excitable, momentous way of speaking when describing inconsequential events, he confuses everyone.
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We are still a bit mental about slow cookers
Hmmm, I was expecting you to do something on IPL commentary, but I thought you might have targeted Ravi Sastri. I find him impossibly irritating.
Hi Dan .. You are abs right … Ravi Shastri is a liability and has outlived his utility ..He must make way for younger and better commentators … ever notice evry time he opens his trap a wicket falls … Overated and manipulative … During his playing days he was heckled by the crowds… Ravi Shastri Hai Hai ( Indian wailing by beating the chestas well)
Dear Ravi,
“Wow” is not commentating.
We know you’re on the IPL ‘governing council’ and all that, but come on.
Kind regards,
King Cricket
- How’s that, Dandy Dan?
Where is the commentary in IPL???
They keep on listing the sponsors name, Lot of people were earlier making jokes about it but now it’s getting ridiculous. That’s a DLF maximum, nearly a DLF maximum, trying to hit a DLF maximum, need a DLF maximum and the same with all the other sponsors names.
Come on lads, lets take a Maxx Mobile strategic time out here – surely the finest moment of IPL commentary was Ravi Shastri’s comments on a large woman celebratin and how she ‘won’t need to go to the gym tomorrow – that’s her exercise for the week’
A masterclass!
KC. Brilliant!
But only if you actually send it to him.
Are you going to?
Ravi Shastri is an irritating commentator … same stlye and tries to highlight words with an emphasis …. ” And the indians are cruising along nicely … what the poms need is a wicket…& lo behold a wicket falls ” … observe it .. He has been hanging around since long 21 years or so …
Fats: that wasn’t just the finest moment of the commentary, it was a Citi Moment of Success.
Carry on Danny … Atta boy UR Just too good …. And Ravi Shastri …Hai hai .. Overated commentator..making oodles of moolah from the cricket crazy nation that is india
I love the random emphasis too – would like to see him in conversation with ColVILE – all normal known speech patterns would be deconstructed.
I am collecting Lalitloves – those little admiring snippets of wisdom brought forth when his Modiness appears on screen – today’s, whilst he was conspicuously ignoring the cricket and on his mobile, was (in hushed reverent tones) “Lalit is making some decisions and communicating them to the world”
Who said that? That’s unbelievably good.
I think it was Harsha – he Lalitloves to perfection
Danny is difficult to understand because he speaks in staccato catch-phrases and hipsterisms. It’s probably not his fault, since just about every NZ commentator does the same thing. Even, on those rare occasions he stops barracking for “his Kiwi boys”, Smuthy.
Here’s a sample of Danny from the KFC Big Bash
Bowlers need to hit the strings.
Kentucky Fried Cosgrove (Subtle plug, Dan.)
They are amped here, the Blues tonight.
New Year’s Eve and a few bubbles. Gotta be done, folks.
Good burgle.
Danny’s IPL vs KC’s Zaltzman podcast.
Screech vs Giggle.
That’s one for the ages.
Or not.
My favourite Danny Morrison IPL moment was when he said “excellent stuff from the boys in blue”.
Apart from the double meaning of the phrase “boys in blue” perhaps only meaningful to English audiences, on that occasion both teams were wearing blue.
It reminded me of the seemingly endless pleasure my American business partner gets from cheering on “the whites” whenever I take him to a CC or test match.
Anyone else noted the strange similarity of voice between Danny Morrison and the eerily similarly named Tony Harrison from the Might Boosh?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmfrLHtNt0U
my favoirat is Danny boy!!!!!!!!! he has redefined cricket wid dis new form of enthusiastic commentry…
danny morison should’ve been d bst commentator in d ipl awards.. IT’s really sad
danny is the most eligible commentator in ipl to represent the matchh
I heard him refer to being hit for six as being “DLF’ed” yesterday…
Commentators also were adamant the Maxx Mobile Strategic Timeout should be taken immediately, rather than after the next over, as teams are making it look like a compulsory timeout. Funny that, given that a total of zero players were asking for a strategic timeout in a 20 over slogfest…
Can’t someone shut him up? His accent is irritating and his non-stop banal commentary spoils the game. The other commentators have a balance.