Hat-tricks are handy

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This and other insights in our latest piece for the Mumbai Mirror which is about the South African team, why it’s good and why it’s bad.

For all that the Saffers have some great batsmen and a strong pace attack, there’s also another version of the side that’s fragile with the bat and wins games with spin. We should probably have mentioned the lack of a lower-order fast-medium all-rounder as well being as we were in the business of picking apart stereotypes.

DON'T BE LIKE GATT!

Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.

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12 comments

  1. Proteas show you can’t choke fun at them anymore

    I sincerely hope you had nothing whatsoever to do with that headline. I was physically sick when I read it. Sick! Physically! It!

    What would have been wrong with something simple and down-to-earth, like “It’s No Choke – Proteas Du-Miny Things Right With Their Positive (H)At-Trick-Tude, So Winning Is As Easy As AB, See.”

    1. We never do headlines. We’d have come up with something worse – certainly nothing close to your masterpiece.

    2. England’s problem is that they can’t Behardien resilient in these sorts of events.

    3. If they do lose in the semis and it’s de Kock’s fault would we see the headline

      “Saffers choke on de kock”

    4. Honestly. I work hard on one of the harde- I mean most difficult members of the team to pun, and the rest of you just chime in with penis jokes.

  2. Hat-tricks are at their handiest when the opposition hasn’t already mullered 342 off you in the previous 49.3 overs.

  3. Ah yes. They were quote ”thrashed by India”. Of course that is writng for an audience of fanatical

  4. To continue……..

    Indian supporters. The fact that SA have repeatedly thrashed India at cricket home and away for several years is, of course, just them choking away.
    Thrashed by India is like being slapped with warm cabbage leaves.

  5. Hat racks are even handier. I wish I could find a hostelry that provides a place for me to hang my boater rather than perch it uneasily on my knees

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