Tag: Will Jefferson

Mighty giants and flying badgers

Twenty20 finals day was how the format should be. When it’s all professional, it’s rubbish. It’s best when it’s a complete shambles and no-one really knows what’s going on.

Lancashire got knocked out in the semi-final, but we didn’t mind because they got knocked out by Will Jefferson. Despite being 11 feet tall, Jefferson’s somehow been keeping a low profile of late. However, he was eye-catching in the super over, making full use of his gargantuan size to smite his enemies.

Jefferson’s ancestor, Finn McCool, once tried to knock someone out by throwing the Isle of Man at them. Jefferson used the same degree of force to launch a cricket ball into the stands. Then he roared.

The final was most notable for the moment when a middle-aged man dived to catch Kieron Pollard. Paul ‘the Badger’ Nixon is a true great of county cricket and few would begrudge him success in his final match. Actually, quite a few people he’s played against would begrudge him success, because he is perhaps the most joyously irritating wicketkeeper there’s ever been, but that’s why we love him.

Finals day also featured an extraordinary number of rain delays and David Lloyd repeatedly doing what must rank as the worst impression of Boycey from Only Fools and Horses of all time. What more could you want from cricket’s most brilliantly stupid format?

Will Jefferson, Nottinghamshire

Will JeffersonA lot of our better updates have been about Will Jefferson. This is partly why we’re watching him for the third season in a row.

We’re mainly watching him like a child with no concept of what’s socially acceptable though; with our mouth agape, pointing and saying ‘why has that piece of scaffolding got a face?’

In ancient history Jefferson’s ancestors smote humans or enslaved them for the construction of gargantuan underground tunnels linking the continents of the world. Maybe this season Will Jefferson will smite county bowling attacks and enslave cricket supporters for thoughtful ‘maybe Will Jefferson’s ready for England’ letters to the local paper.

County cricketers to watch in 2008

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