Six reasons why England will win the World T20

Everyone likes a list. Unless it’s for the big shop. We never use a list when food shopping and last week, planning on doing a roast followed by cheese, we bought everything bar the chicken and the cheese.

So it goes.

But away from the fluorescent-illuminated stationary trolleys of dawdling fat people pawing at the fizzy pop, lists are fine. As such, here are our six reasons why England will win the World T20.

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16 Appeals

  1. Stuart Broad says that “in Test cricket, you need eight or nine guys to have a really good game, in T20 you need two or three max”.

    This may be the stupidest thing ever said by a cricketer.

  2. Loving the channeling of Kurt Vonnegut in a cricket context. I think you’ve done that before, haven’t you?

  3. You won’t believe how England can win the World T20! Here are six amazing reasons!

    • I’ve never much liked the acronym “LOL”, but have discovered a way to tolerate it. Instead of “laugh out loud”, one substitutes “lots of lager”. You will find that it works semantically in most cases.

      When it doesn’t work, you can treat it as an instruction, or assume that the user of said acronym is informing you of the nature of their most recent repast.

  4. The comments on Cricinfo from people that have clearly taken something like this as a serious article never cease to make me smile.

  5. Looking ahead, after the World T20 has endeth:

    … and here are Six reasons (and one bonus reason!) why England DID NOT win the World T20.

    1. did not have momentum
    2. were predictable
    3. too many players in excellent/poor form
    4. too many bowling options, but no strike bowlers
    5. Bopara’s batting letdown
    6. you can write off this team!
    7. KP (who else?)

  6. 6 reasons will be the 6 different variations jade bowls to win the whole thing when restricting whoever we play in the final, to 3 in the final over when they only needed 5 to win.
    Inky Jade MBE.

  7. That bit about Bopara not aborting his run-up.

  8. The day you returned from your big shop without the chicken, did you demolish a Nandos instead, KC? Or what?

    Please stop sparing us these vital details.

    • King Cricket

      March 21, 2014 at 9:50 am

      No, we made a second shop and then made something that was actually quite akin to a Nandos. We then obliterated it – by which we mean that we ate it.

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