So many bowlers, such pink balls, highly questionable invincibility – Mop-up of the day

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Welcome to Tuesday.

Here are some things people may or may not want to talk about this Tuesday.

England beat New Zealand fairly easily

Heather Knight’s world champions hadn’t actually played a one-day international since December 2019, but they beat New Zealand in the first of three matches without too much trouble.

Normally when a team gets bowled out for 178 the opposition hasn’t needed to resort to using too many bowlers, but England used seven – and all of them took a wicket.

Billy Bowden was one of the umpires. It occurred to use we haven’t seen Billy Bowden in ages.

Billy Bowden has blighted our life as a cricket writer through inadvertently encouraging everyone to use the wrong vowel sound for our surname.

We’re going to start calling him ‘Byley’ – see how he likes it.

New Zealand and England will play two more one-dayers and then three T20 internationals.

The first match of the Hundred

One day the Hundred won’t be this theoretical thing that’s 100% player drafts and rules and announcements and preamble. One day they’ll actually play cricket.

The tournament is due to begin on July 21 with a women’s fixture between Oval Invincibles and Manchester Originals.

This opens up the enticing possibility that the millions of people tuning in to watch on the BBC will see a stupid, overly-boastful team name comprehensively disproven at the very earliest opportunity.

Pink ball Test between India and England

There are pros and cons of the day-night Test between India and England that starts tomorrow (Wednesday).

The main pro is that the match takes place at a nice sort of time if you’re in the UK. They’ll start each day at 9am and finish some time before 5pm.

The main con is that it is highly likely to derail the turning pitch ‘narrative’ for a time.

A change of topic is not in itself bad, but it disrupts the flow. It’s like when you’re really into a TV series and they throw in some flashback episode. It’s great and all – and it’ll probably enrich the story in the long run – but it’s not really what you’ve been watching and you were kind of all set to find out what was going to happen with that other thing.

The match is being played in Ahmedabad, home of the step well.

29 comments

    1. I think there are two:

      The Billy way: “Bow” as in “to incline the head or body in salutation OR to acknowledge applause”
      The Alex way: “Bow” as in “a weapon for shooting arrows OR a long, thin piece of wood with many hairs stretched between its ends, used to play musical instruments that have strings”

      in either case followed by “den” as in “place a lion lives OR play room”.

      1. Probably Billy should change his name to Billy Bow Den

        I am not a fan of pronouncing a single word Bowden as two words Bow-den

      2. My bad for exaggerating the second syllabub in order to try and give a sense to the phonetics of it. In both cases it is pronounced more like “dn” than a full blown “den”.

        As for right way or wrong way, KC, surely Kiwi vowels are by definition simply weird.

        In the spirit of diversity, though, surely we can accept that in New Zealand (a country with just a few million people), their bizarre pronunciation is correct, whereas for the remaining 7 Billion or so people on earth the Kiwi pronunciation is wrong, while the KC pronunciation is correct.

      3. We’ve just remembered that our old headmaster – not a Kiwi – had the same surname and also pronounced it the wrong way.

      4. How can you “just remember” that your headmaster shared your surname by spelling but not pronunciation, after spouting off for several sentences about the blight placed upon your life by Billy Bowden, who only tangentially entered your life many years after your so-called education?

        That would be a bit like me suggesting that Don Bennett blighted my cricketing career by rubbishing my bowling after one ball…

        http://ianlouisharris.com/2009/06/30/the-day-garfield-sobers-watched-me-zyen-play-cricket-lords-30-june-2009/

        …only to then “suddenly remember” Mr Banson at school, who spent years rubbishing my (and everybody else’s) cricket, usually with a clip around the ear to make sure his admonition had been understood.

  1. Boo to 9am starts. I had been enjoying my bit of peace and quiet in the small hours.

    Boo to getting any work done for the next five days.

  2. Reckon the spam filter swallowed my first attempt because I had the temerity to include links, so:

    I think that’s equalled the record for the most bowlers taking wickets in an international innings, although it’s hard to be sure because cricinfo doesn’t maintain those records for women’s cricket, sadly. But 7 bowlers taking wickets appears to be the most so far for the men, with 4 occurrences each for ODIs and Tests.

    Every time it’s happened in ODIs, the 7-bowler team won. Every time it’s happened in Tests, the 7-bowler team lost. Unsurprisingly, New Zealand are the most 7-bowlery team, having done it three times (2 ODIs, 1 Test).

    1. Oh, T20Is – also 7, with three occurrences. Perhaps this is some sort of universal physical constant like the Planck length.

  3. I live in Ahmedabad. Well, it’s actually Gandhinagar which is pretty close to Ahmedabad. There is a huge step well a few kilometers from where I live as well (kings those days built these for their queens apparently – how else were you supposed to spend the tax money?). I went down that well till I reached the very bottom. Only water, still no beer.

    My search continues.

    1. Well, well, well. Did you find any UK cabinet ministers down there at the very bottom, DC?

      Are we to expect a match report from one or both of the Ahmedabad test matches?

      Gujarat isn’t really the best State in India to go in search of beer, is it? But you knew that.

      Stay well…

      …by which I mean healthy…

      …I didn’t mean “remain in the step well” or anything like that.

      1. I can’t put this reply against the comment I wish to reply to…

        But there can’t have been more than one teacher called Mr Banson who disparaged my (and countless others’) cricketing abilities in the mid 80s?

        Can there? This one was also partial to bit of mild physical violence too

      2. Given that the entire country is a little relaxed now in terms of social distancing protocols, Ged, I don’t think I’ll be going to the matches. Alas, there goes my chances of getting something published on this site in 2024.

      3. What a brilliant idea.

        I know you don’t do requests, KC, but DC might do requests.

        It might rank up there with the great match reports, DC. My own humble effort of reporting the day in August 2015 when I went neither to Trent Bridge to see the Ashes, nor to Lord’s as planned, might serve as a pale example:

        http://ianlouisharris.com/2015/08/06/the-day-i-didnt-go-to-cricket-with-paul-deacon-i-watched-tv-for-several-hours-instead-6-august-2015/

        KC-style delay in my own publishing there – some 16 months after the non-event.

    2. The well went down very deep. Very deep went down the well. The well went down so very deep. Well the well went down to…

  4. I knew there couldn’t be another one

    Unless you were any good aged 11, he’d offer no encouragement

    When I saw him at Founder’s Day a couple of decades ago he was pretty dismissive about my “talent, or lack thereof” despite having just scored 60 odd for the Old Boys

    He almost extinguished my enthusiasm for the game before it even took hold

    1. Yup. Barry Banson would argue that the very fact that the two of us have retained & developed a love for cricket over the decades attests to his “tough love” methods. But I would thoroughly disagree with both that analysis and the methods.

      In my case, I was lucky to have mitigating factors. Colin Page was another teacher active with cricket who had a very different and encouraging style for my involvement in the cricket. Also, my rather sporty year (1973-80) had a great bunch of pupils – I am still friends with several of them – who were inclusive & encouraging in their attitude to sport.

      Further, nothing that Banson ever did and said could take away the hat trick I took in a second year inter-class game when I was 12:

      http://ianlouisharris.com/1975/07/09/the-day-i-took-a-hat-trick-at-cricket-alleyns-school-9-july-1975/

      Shove it up yer arse, Banson, Ged and Alex are the best cricketers in the world.

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