18

Coming soon on King Cricket

Bowled on 29th September, 2008 at 20:32 by King Cricket
Category: King Cricket

Laurence Elderbrook has one more match left this season. We were quite pleased when his reports were met with initial apathy, because the man’s a bell-end and we wanted to get rid of him. Unfortunately, some of you seem to have warmed to him, so we’re having to find a way of keeping him on.

After having the idea appear in front of us without our having to do any actual thinking, we’ve decided to do an ‘Ask Laurence’ feature, where you can question the great man and get him to solve all your problems. Try and make a few of the questions about cricket because that’s his area of expertise.

You can leave comments, but it might be better if you email us so that we don’t lose them. Depending how many questions we get, this feature will probably start next week.

On a less irritating note, we’ve got something of rare beauty appearing on Wednesday, so make sure you visit then. We can assure you that, for once, something will be appearing on this site that isn’t rubbish.

We just finished reading Lights Out in Wonderland. It improved, but...

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  1. Reply
    Jo Fitz   //   September 29th, 2008 at 21:11

    Is the thing of beauty Stuart Broad? Or is that too damn obvious?

  2. Reply
    Dave   //   September 29th, 2008 at 22:01

    Has someone found another moron centre sign?

  3. Reply
    miriam   //   September 29th, 2008 at 23:25

    please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please let it be a cat post.

  4. Reply
    SixSixEight   //   September 30th, 2008 at 00:53

    Why Wednesday?

  5. Reply
    Mahinda   //   September 30th, 2008 at 02:49

    I think we need to do something about all these women frequenting the site, with their lustful leanings towards comely cricketers. It’s just not cricket!

    *checks out England women’s team website*

    Laura Marsh. Hubba. Can we have her on Wednesday? Possibly with a cat.

  6. Reply
    Whit   //   September 30th, 2008 at 05:31

    How could Laurence be irratating!!!! The man has been robbed by umpires who clearly have no insight as to what it takes to be a great cricketer. He no doubt brings the crowds back to village cricket. KP has nothing on Laurence’s ability to humilate the best of attacks.

  7. Reply
    D Charlton   //   September 30th, 2008 at 08:45

    Isa Guha. That’s my vote. Isa Guha. Or a cat post รขโ‚ฌโ€œ like those.

  8. Reply
    Suave   //   September 30th, 2008 at 09:31

    I’m with Douglas on the Isa Guha front.

    Not literally, that would be disgusting.

  9. Reply
    dynamo harrow   //   September 30th, 2008 at 10:14

    Uh, uh…I saw Isa first.

    The pics of Ebony Rainford-Brent on Cricinfo don’t do her justice. Perhaps an article with a pic of Isa and Ebony with cats arranged to spell out Ebony’s full-on, eye-watering, hyphen-tastic name.

    Anyway, roll on Wednesday.

    Incidentally, when is Elders going to get his own bio on Cricinfo?

  10. Reply
    D Charlton   //   September 30th, 2008 at 10:45

    I am so looking forward to Wednesday now that it can but be a let down, even if i do end up on Isa Guha’s front (with or without Suave).

  11. Reply
    Ged Ladd   //   September 30th, 2008 at 15:55

    My arm you saw Isa Guha first, Dynamo. Daisy and I saw Isa Guha play live in the attached match more than 5 years ago:

    http://uk.cricinfo.com/db/ARCHIVE/2003/OTHERS/RSA-WOMEN_IN_ENG/SCORECARDS/RSA-WOMEN_ENG-WOMEN_WT1_07-10AUG2003.html

    I challenge anyone to claim that they saw her play sooner than this and indeed saw her play live.

    FYI, I reckon that Daisy and I were the only people at Shenley that day who were not either participating in the match in some way or close friends/relations of the players.

  12. Reply
    Dave   //   September 30th, 2008 at 16:04

    I’m going to put in a vote for Holly Colvin before anyone else does.

  13. Reply
    Lemon Bella   //   September 30th, 2008 at 19:10

    Miriam, I was going to provide excellent material for a cat post, having recently acquired a new cat. However, he has gone missing and so I can’t because it will make me cry.

  14. Reply
    Lemon Bella   //   September 30th, 2008 at 19:12

    For what it’s worth, I *hate* Laurence Elderbrook. I was hoping that last post was the back of him.

  15. Reply
    King Cricket   //   September 30th, 2008 at 20:16

    Sorry to hear that Lemon Bella. (This relates to the first comment.)

  16. Reply
    Dave   //   September 30th, 2008 at 21:51

    A cat post would be good, but it’d have to work very hard to top Cat Town.

  17. Reply
    miriam   //   September 30th, 2008 at 22:48

    Cat Town!

    Lemon Bella that has almost made me cry! please tell me it isn’t Meowcus Trescattick who is lost!

  18. Reply
    Lemon Bella   //   October 1st, 2008 at 18:44

    It is Meowcus Trescattick who is lost. He’s been officially named Sunshine but to all at King Cricket he is Meowcus Trescattick. If I ever find him.

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