If you’d like to chip in to support King Cricket, you can (please do)

Some weeks we publish quite a bit here on King Cricket and other weeks not so much. The drier weeks are the unhappy by-product of needing to write things for other people so that we can earn a living.

The quiet weeks nag away at us though, so we’ve set up a Patreon crowdfunding page in the hope that a few people will chip in and we’ll be able to devote more time to the site and less to other people.

Here’s our Patreon page.

The important thing to note about Patreon is that it’s a *monthly* payment, not a one-off. (Another thing to note is that Patreon will tack on VAT.)

There are three King Cricket funding tiers (plus two nonsense tiers for sponsors that’ll never be needed, so let’s not even mention them). The amounts are just starting points. You can choose to pledge whatever you want.

The three tiers are:

  • The $1 option
  • The $3.38 ‘buy us a pint’ option
  • The $10 ‘Honorific’ option

That last one buys the right to call yourself ‘Sir’ or ‘Dame’ in the comments section (but only if you want to).

If you’d like to pledge, it’s very easy. Pick a monthly amount, set up the payments in Patreon – and that’s it.

Our initial goal is to nurdle our way to a Collingwoodesque half century of patrons.

Longer term, we’re really keen to raise our bat for 100 patrons, at which point we’ll commit to doing at least one 1,000-word feature each month. The kind of stuff you could expect would range from the recent piece about Ben Stokes, Jack Leach and the Headingley Test to that one about what it’s like to be Virat Kohli.

You can pledge to support King Cricket here.

Huge, Dwayne Leverock-sized thanks in advance to anyone who does so. You’re helping sustain an independent website for all of our readers.

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57 Appeals

  1. Done. I hope you reach the century (and double, and triple etc.) with a Sehwagian flourish.

  2. Good luck KC.

    A recent recurring theme in your comments beneath your posts is that you seem shocked that people appreciate and value your writing so I’ll say this, hoping I speak for more than just myself. The way you combine your generally wry outlook, familiarity with random bits of pop culture, very deep knowledge of cricket, and random stuff about rodents etc is a potent mix indeed. When you hit top gear you are very, very funny indeed, as well as (and often simultaneously) very deep. Hell, sometimes, you verge on being moving. Plus, on top of all this, a reader gets the huge bonus of the comments section, which is always entertaining, and sometimes transcends that – especially when the regulars get on a roll.

    So yeah, basically, don’t have any doubts, you provide a highly valued service to a lot of us I’m sure. Thanks for doing it! I hope you make a decent sum from this. You deserve it after all the hours you’ve put in over the years, even if it is just basically your hobby.

    • King Cricket

      August 29, 2019 at 10:15 am

      That’s super-kind Gareth. It genuinely means a lot.

      That’s probably the nicest thing about the crowdfunding too. Every time someone pledges, it’s the opposite of the normal experience of being a freelance writer, which basically amounts to multiple different ways of being told that you aren’t worth a great deal.

  3. King Cricket

    August 29, 2019 at 11:31 am

    A needless update at what is hopefully still a relatively early phase of our innings.

    We are at this moment 14 not out.

    When compared to England batting averages, that is more than Steve Harmison and on a par with Phil Defreitas.

    We’re confident we can get past Derek Pringle and Robert Croft before lunch.

    • King Cricket

      August 29, 2019 at 1:52 pm

      Another update: We’re now level with Stuart Broad and hoping we can get past Ashley Giles and Mark Ealham before the end of the working day.

  4. $3.38 (£2.77) for a pint? Did you move?

    • Just read what you and put on patreon, and boy, do I now feel quite the silly ploker.

      • King Cricket

        August 29, 2019 at 12:45 pm

        Yes, we’d be hard pressed to get a pint for that round here. We also don’t often get out for a pint at the minute, hence the reference to the days when we could claim to have a ‘local’.

  5. Done. I will consider myself a dab to third man in your nurdle to greatness

  6. I’m in for the price of a London pint per month.

    My credit card company has tried very hard to decline this commitment this afternoon, but a nice lady in India now assures me that the block on my account has now been removed and Patreon infers same by claiming that my card details have now been accepted.

    Next month I’ll come up to Manchester and buy you a pint in person. Quicker. Cheaper. More convivial.

    • King Cricket

      August 29, 2019 at 4:54 pm

      You appear to be in for a series of dashes at the moment, which is innovative of you.

      Yes, we accept tangible real world pints also.

      • Patreon’s help advised not to put in the amount again because the system might try to collect a second time and so the amount might go through twice.

        It also said I should check in a couple of days time and if it still hasn’t gone through I should pledge the money again.

        The use of language in the Patreon help is something else. It advised me to “reach out to my credit card company”. There’s nothing about phoning those soulless credit card company call centres that feels like “reaching out” to me. Retching out is more like it.

      • King Cricket

        August 29, 2019 at 5:16 pm

        We are very sorry to have inadvertently inflicted that experience upon you.

    • King Cricket

      August 29, 2019 at 5:09 pm

      The price of a London pint gets you a knighthood, right?

      You know… because London’s really expensive…

      (A pint costs over a fiver in the nearest pub to our house.)

      • £5.19 apparently. I make that $6.30 in real money.

        I would pay extra to avoid the knighthood though. Not my scene. Besides which, Sir Ged, when said quickly, sounds like a suitable nickname e.g. for Frankenstein’s Creature.

      • Oh I dunno, Sir Ged Ladd sounds positively Arthurian to me.

      • I haven’t worked out what a pint of my homebrew costs – mostly because I suspect it’s more than I pretend it to be – even without before the batches which go down the drain. Also, a pint is a very confusing thing for a metrical antipodean (spell check: anti pigeon) like myself. They seem to have gotten smaller over the years. Or I have gotten bigger. Which is to say that if you are in Wellington I’ll be far too shy to ask you around for a pint, but I have enjoyed your writing for years so I am thoroughly chuffed to be able to contribute to. (Can one be partially chuffed?)

      • King Cricket

        August 30, 2019 at 10:07 am

        You can be particularly chuffed and we’re delighted that you are.

        Thank you.,

  7. Seems to be some sort of issue with the card number input for me, I will endeavour to try on a different device later.

    I am guessing the exchange rate will change each month so that a $1 or $4 subscription would buy you the equivalent of 100 pints (at today’s prices) after The Bad Thing happens?

  8. Good job I can’t handle more than 4 pints then.

  9. Sorted (I think) O king. Continue to lighten my day.xx

    • King Cricket

      August 29, 2019 at 7:38 pm

      Pretty sure we’ve deduced which person you are on there. Think the payment may have failed like Ged’s did but maybe wait and see what happens before doing anything rash.

      Thanks in advance. Glad you’re still visiting after all these years.

  10. S Smithawardene

    August 29, 2019 at 6:07 pm

    I’m in for a nurdle the keep the covers off. To be completely clear I’m donating solely for Rob Key on a capybara, not for anything before or since. It’s really stayed with me.

  11. Keep up the good work. Can’t believe you’ve exceeded the VAT threshold already!

    • King Cricket

      August 29, 2019 at 8:35 pm

      The threshold seemed to be £0. We don’t really understand to be honest.

  12. Ok, you have successfully managed to inspire me to actually donating. I must say that I have been a silent lurker for years.
    I only hope His-Maj does not start fundraising consulting for PBS/NPR, they have been trying to get me for years.

  13. It was pretty obvious today that yesterday’s palaver had not actually triggered a payment or a patronage, so I have now done the deed.

    This gets your score up to that pivotal batting average number. You know the one. the one that all too few England batsmen are achieving at the moment. Mercifully too few Aussie batsmen are achieving it also. But King Cricket is there and on the way up!

    • King Cricket

      August 30, 2019 at 9:32 am

      Number of pledges expressed in terms of England cricketer batting averages update…

      We’re level with Strauss and bearing down on Vaughan and Bell.

  14. What’s a $ ? Is it what it looks like – a rubbish attempt to hide a capital S?

    Anyway, on the basis that whatever it is, it’s probably not money, I have signed up. God, imagine that, if it turned out that it was money we were pledging. Doesn’t bear thinking about.

    Now all that remains is to make good on my new role, so here goes. Well done you. I bet your mum is really proud of you, like when you did that drawing in Year 1. I’m sure that in a few years you’ll be a lot better at doing this thing, maybe even competent.

    Tell me, do we have to do this patronising thing every month, or is it just a one-off?

    • Ah bless. Bert’s trying to be funny. He’s trying so hard too.

      Come on people, show your appreciation.


    • King Cricket

      August 30, 2019 at 3:35 pm

      We’ve got to pull you up on “Year 1”.

      We didn’t have Year 1 back in those days. Back then we called it Miss Pendlebury’s Class.

      • I can’t remember the name of the nice teacher in my first primary school year. “Miss Something’s Class” it was, though.

        Second year was “Miss Street’s Class”. Miss Street had a moustache with more veracity to it than anything I could muster until I was well into my twenties. I wonder whether Miss Street drank stout or JW Lees or something of that ilk to make her so hirsute?

      • For heaven’s sake Ged, Year 1 isn’t the first year of school. That’s reception. Year 1 is the second year, what you are claiming to know as “Miss Street’s Class”.

        Imagine the chaos if kids thought that Year 1 was year one. How would they get through their maths then, eh?

      • Ah, then “Miss Street’s Class” it was, Year One. Remarks about her moustache still apply. I do also remember her being very kindly and very partial to dishing our stars in my direction.

        I still can’t remember the name of the nice lady from the Reception Class but it might yet pop into my head…probably when I’m trying to remember some obscure cricket statistic or something.

  15. I’m curious if I can call myself ‘Sir’ without contributing anything.

  16. The patrons-as-England-test-averages has made me look at a list of England´s highest test averages for the first time. Who knew that Henry Wood was such a hero? And with a glorious first class average of 16,94. There can´t be many with a bigger gap than that.

    I hope that this pays off as pointless quiz style trivia at some point.

  17. This ‘knight of the realm’ malarkey is quite a promotion for a humble bard.

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