Pakistan thrive on hardship and chaos

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< 1 minute read

Younus Khan has a stab at smilingPakistan. Is there any sporting team in the world for which the link between sound preparation and performance is less meaningful?

Having lost what was arguably the best new ball attack of its time as a result of that spot fixing thing, Pakistan rebuilt their bowling around Saeed Ajmal. Being as he’s been banned for chucking, they have now been forced to field an attack where the four main bowlers boast eight Test matches between them.

Needless to say, they’re absolutely battering Australia.

Australia’s first innings 303 hinted that maybe the pitch was deteriorating. Pakistan’s second innings 286-2 rebuffed that. Pakistan’s batting has been dire for the last few years but it has just managed 700-odd runs for the loss of 12 wickets.

Younus Khan has spent most of the build-up to this series maintaining a gold standard strop about being dropped from the one-day side.

“Don’t select me, not even in Tests – I sacrifice my future,” he said a couple of weeks ago. Today he scored his second hundred of the match.

Australia are currently 59-4 chasing 438 and will almost certainly win.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


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  1. Seeing Pakistan outplay Australia is one of those life-affirming experiences that makes getting up at stupid a.m just to watch some cricket worthwhile.

    I hope someone in the team is handing out scorecards of the 2010 Headingley test and saying, “look fellows, beating these guys is entirely possible”.

    1. Some sort of bleak period drama which culminates in all the men going off to war and then dying of getting bullets in them.

  2. Hey KC. How about a delete button for comments? Just in case someone embarrasses themselves by trying three times to put a three word comment in. In most of life you can pretend to be competent by covering up your mistakes – why not here?

    1. It’s just nice for us to see someone else’s mistakes for once.

      That was an admirable effort, by the way.

  3. No-one would have notice your late night embarrassments, Bert, had you not drawn attention to them.

    But now we are all fully appraised and ready to bant.

  4. Nice to see Warner wanting to hang around and scrap on a dodgy pitch. In no way would I have picked the manner of his demise. Totally in keeping with Pakistan’s “bizarro world” cricket.

  5. “Australia are currently 59-4 chasing 438 and will almost certainly win.”

    Onya, KC, for your optimism/pessimism/satire.

    I’m not Australian, but I believe that “onya” is what they say?

    1. What bliss.

      The Aussies utterly thrashed by Pakistan’s Second XI bowling attack…

      …not least a fivefer for Zulfiqar Babar, who, along with Varun Aaron of India, is part of the rhyming names/1980s bands revival, as discussed on the afternoon of 8 August et. seq. on the following thread:

      Not only a rhyming name in this case, but Zulfiqar Babar also sounds like an especially sweet desert in a Turkish restaurant.

  6. If Bert wishes to redeem himself on this thread, the very least he can do is describe to us, if need be in excruciating detail, what he had to drink last night in the lead up to his several “just after midnight” postings.

    1. Two pints of bitter and a bottle of Fleurie.

      What? What’s the problem? I’m comfortable with my northern-ness, I don’t need to flaunt it.


    2. “Two pints of bitter and a bottle of Fleurie” would make a very good song and/or sit. com. title, I’d suggest.

      Meanwhile, in other Northern news, Daisy and I have just got back from the cinema, where we saw Northern Soul, which was excellent.

      Bravely, the movie was screened without subtitles here in London, which was challenging for us at first but Daisy and I soon got the gist of it.


  7. Australia have lost to Zimbabwe (ODI) & Pakistan in the last couple of months, but our media is strangely calm.

    I would have expected calls for heads to roll, pitchforks & angry mobs.

    The honeymoon period is still on.
    Shows how much we value ashes victories, followed by beating the south africans.

  8. It isn’t healthy for Test cricket to have so many onesided contests. Fortunately the Banglazim match is shaping up for a tense finish. That’s how you do it, Austrakistan.

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