Replacing Shane Bond

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< 1 minute read

Yesterday, we suggested that Shane Bond adopt a disguise in order to represent his country.

It’s okay, he doesn’t need to. Our scouts have identified four young bowlers who could replace the injury-prone paceman for New Zealand.

Ceci has found Ryan Shanebondom:

Ryan Shanebondom

And Andrew Webster, of Spun Out fame, has picked out no fewer than three potential replacements:

Shaun Bond

Shine Bond

Optimus Bond

Andrew does concede that Optimus Bond may not be the best option, “as it may lead to him being stalked by Mark Ramprakash.”


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?


  1. I vote for Andrew’s first one there. It’ll be really confusing knowing which Vettori is the real one though…

  2. i say… let them all play…. and then when graeme hick is recalled, he can bludgeon them all…… with 40500+ first class runs to his credit i don’t think even the emergence of rodimus prime would put him off his game. Thats right optimus prime briefly died….. the new leader of the autobots was rodimus……. can everyone sneak rodimus into a conversation today? e.g. ‘would you like sugar with your tea’….. answer…. ‘yes dear, that would be rodimus’……

  3. That’s some gloriously sneaky sneaking there, T.

    Replacing the word ‘nice’ with ‘rodimus’ is hardly likely to be noticed.

  4. Pah to Shade Bone – what makes today utterly rodissimus is the news from the Times that “Robert Key saw his prospects of an England recall increase today, after he was named in England & Wales Cricket Board’s 26-man Performance Squad for the 2008 international summer. ”

    Hurrah! A Pink Revolution in imminent!

  5. Why, these pictures are beautiful. Please could we continue the theme of “disguise Shane Bond” through the summer?

    The people who designed the IPL uniforms really missed a trick by not redesigning the helmets a la Andrew Webster’s third picture.

  6. “Shane Bond – Surreptitious Cricketer” would be a great thing for him to have on his business cards. Although actually handing them out would lack a certain something in the subterfuge stakes, I suppose.

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