We’re really worried that they forgot to actually serve dinner at the Rajasthan Royals welcome dinner

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3 minute read

This event looks like an absolute bloody nightmare on almost every level.

According to Rajasthan Royals, “the welcome dinner was all about cheering our RR team members for the long but fruitful road ahead.”

Shouldn’t it be about dinner?

You can’t promise people food and then not deliver food. That is cruelty beyond belief. You will immediately appreciate that truth if you’ve ever suffered the agony of ordering a takeaway that didn’t actually turn up until several hours after you expected it.

There is no joy to be had from eating greatly belated takeaway food. Your mood is already light years from where it should be and all you can hope for then is that you can successfully apply the emotional brakes. The night is already ruined. What would have made you happy can now only limit the damage.

But at least in that scenario you do actually get food and aren’t asked to do a bunch of awful stuff instead.

Of the below activities, we could maybe, at a push, briefly tolerate the first one.

The Rajasthan Royals welcome dinner included:


Awkward small talk…


Mandatory public speaking…

Listening to other people who have been forced to do public speaking…

Listening to lots and lots of people who have been forced to do public speaking…

Basically everyone really…

Then more bloody dancing…

The Rajasthan Royals welcome dinner did not – as far as we can make out – include:


If you start following us on Twitter or Mastodon quickly enough you’ll be in time to catch us tweeting/tooting links to this very article. Maybe in the summer we’ll start posting other stuff on social media again – probably while we’re watching the Test highlights at around 11pm after we’ve had a couple of swifts.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


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  1. Do we suspect that this even was held at lunchtime, such that the absence of dinner was an absence of the meal that you, KC, together with other folk from the North of England, call dinner?

    Or was the event held in the evening, making the absence of dinner an absence of the meal that I and many other English-speaking folk, call dinner?

    I think it is very important that we readers know precisely which meal of the day was not served at this particular so-called-dinner event.

    1. To be fair, there is food on show in the photograph promoting the event, but that food could only be described as snacks – more the sort of fare one might expect at an event for The Hundred.

      “Originals Welcome Nibbles 2023”.

      1. That is even worse. That is immediately focusing people’s minds and stomachs on food without following up and meeting that need.

  2. It’s not an advertisement for an event, it’s a plea. It’s precisely because they weren’t given any food that the Royals kept telling everyone that some dinner in 2023 would be rather welcome.

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