Skip to content
King Cricket

King Cricket

Independent and irreverent cricket writing

  • Home
  • News
  • Features
  • Extras
  • About us
  • Contact us
  • Buy our book!

Author: Count Cricket

September 4, 2012 County cricket

Count Cricket’s county cricket round-up – September 4th

2 minute readGood day to you all. I, Count Cricket, have been following Durham around these last few weeks in my role as King Cricket’s roving county cricket reporter. I have developed a taste for Onions, you see. He really is rather delicious. A few sips of warming brandy, combined with the

Continue reading
July 31, 2012 County cricket

Count Cricket’s county cricket round-up – July 31st

< 1 minute readGood day to you all. Count Cricket here. Apologies for my absence, but certain developments have led to my spending several weeks indoors. Frustrating, but unavoidable. Fortunately, I did manage to read the newspaper during this unscheduled ‘downtime’ and have kept tabs on County Championship developments. I can basically sum

Continue reading
June 6, 2012 County cricket

Count Cricket’s county round-up – June 6th

< 1 minute readGood day to you all. Last week, I, Count Cricket, attended Durham v Lancashire at Chester-le-Street. Lancashire won and lifted themselves to mid-table respectability. Some damp weather caused me to seek shelter in the toilets for a time. While there, I met a pleasant woman who informed me that King

Continue reading
May 29, 2012 County cricket

Count Cricket’s county cricket round-up – May 29th

< 1 minute readGood day to you all. Last week, I, Count Cricket, attended Sussex v Nottinghamshire. Nottinghamshire won and so went to the top of the table. The weather was good, so I protected my pallid skin by withdrawing to Hove’s toilets where I quaffed brandy from my thermos. Very pleasant it

Continue reading
May 20, 2012 County cricket

Count Cricket’s county cricket round-up – May 20th

< 1 minute readGood day to you. I am Count Cricket. This week I was at Edgbaston where batting conditions were so friendly even Lancashire passed 300. Following a draw, Warwickshire remain top of the table. One of the most notable performances was that of Rikki Clarke. During one of my visits to

Continue reading
May 14, 2012 County cricket

Count Cricket’s county cricket round-up – May 14th

< 1 minute readGood day to you all. I, Count Cricket, attended the Nottinghamshire v Middlesex match last week in my role as King Cricket’s county reporter. Due to heavy rain, I was forced to seek refuge in the toilets. Fortunately, I discovered that I could emerge and check the scoreboard from time

Continue reading
May 6, 2012 County cricket

Count Cricket’s county cricket round-up – May 6th

< 1 minute readGood day. I am Count Cricket. My parole officer told me it would aid my rehabilitation to find some form of employment and King Cricket has offered to pay me £2.70 to cover the county cricket season for his “website”. I assume he needs to subcontract because he is too

Continue reading

About King Cricket

  • Home
  • About us
  • Contact us
  • Get our articles by email
  • Follow us on Bluesky

Support King Cricket

  • Our Patreon crowdfunder

Buy our book

Search King Cricket

Latest features

  • Did you see… Harry Brook’s first ball in Melbourne? Unquestionably the 2025/26 Ashes’ finest momentJanuary 13, 2026
  • Sky Sports has boiled its Ashes coverage down to its purest and greatest form: Mike Atherton and Nasser Hussain standing there talking about what’s gone wrongDecember 18, 2025
  • The 2019 Ridiculous Ashes (podcast)December 10, 2025
  • The 50 Most Ridiculous Ashes Moments is definitely out now – you should buy it for someone! (Possibly yourself)November 6, 2025
  • 51. Michael Vaughan Declines A CrushingOctober 29, 2025

Read one of these next…

  • It’s time to talk about John Emburey inhaling an entire creme caramel in one go like some kind of pudding hoover

    It’s time to talk about John Emburey inhaling an entire creme caramel in one go like some kind of pudding hoover

  • Five bonkers moments from the 2019 Cricket World Cup final – but which was the most uniquely cricket?

    Five bonkers moments from the 2019 Cricket World Cup final – but which was the most uniquely cricket?

  • When and where is AB de Villiers at his best?

    When and where is AB de Villiers at his best?

  • In praise of the matter-of-fact dynamism of Travis Head

    In praise of the matter-of-fact dynamism of Travis Head

  • Cheteshwar Pujara is trying to sidle out on the sly – but we ain’t gonna let him, are we?

    Cheteshwar Pujara is trying to sidle out on the sly – but we ain’t gonna let him, are we?

Archives

Cricket history

  • Ancient history

King Cricket T-shirts

t_shirt_ad.jpg

What we mostly seem to write about

  • England
  • Australia
  • India
  • Other nations
  • County cricket
  • IPL

Latest comments

  1. pettsvaldo on Zimbabwe have blown Australia’s lid off againFebruary 13, 2026

    I feel like the poster child for the "if something goes wrong, never attempt anything like it ever again" approach…

  2. Ged Ladd on Watch out! Rahmanullah Gurbaz has discovered a new angleFebruary 13, 2026

    …and in other intriguing news about orange people/places, USA soundly beat Netherlands (or do I mean Denmark…Iceland…Greenland…) today.

  3. King Cricket on Zimbabwe have blown Australia’s lid off againFebruary 13, 2026

    We have to say, after apparently cracking the Masakadza family's naming system just now, we were very excited to click…

  4. King Cricket on Feel The Thrill: Highlights and lowlights of the official song of the Men’s T20 World Cup 2026February 13, 2026

    It has to be said, your version does actually make marginally more sense in that context.

  5. Tim on Zimbabwe have blown Australia’s lid off againFebruary 13, 2026

    'How will Australia ever break Zimbabwe's hold over them in T20?' will be the talk of the cricketing world for…

RSS Animals being conspicuously indifferent to cricket

  • A cat finally being won over to cricket by the sheer ridiculousness of the Ashes
  • A cat continuing to maintain almost ostentatiously conspicuous indifference to cricket
  • Conspicuous indifference to Dan Lawrence’s gyrations from a human being

RSS Match reports

  • Match Report: Ireland vs England, 2nd T20, Malahide
  • Keep your enemies closer | a 2019 Edgbaston Ashes Test match report
  • Match report: Sixes, Fulham

RSS Cricket bats in unusual places

  • A Device-like cricket-style bat in a Mexican corrido music video
  • Exclusive: Rob Key fails to attain even second billing to Nasser Hussain at a restaurant – a new career low
  • A cricket book alongside Australia’s most ridiculous Ashes captain (statue)

About King Cricket

  • Home
  • About us
  • Contact us
  • Get our articles by email
  • Follow us on Bluesky

Support King Cricket

  • Our Patreon crowdfunder

Recent Posts

  • Zimbabwe have blown Australia’s lid off again
  • Watch out! Rahmanullah Gurbaz has discovered a new angle
  • Feel The Thrill: Highlights and lowlights of the official song of the Men’s T20 World Cup 2026
  • What shall we do with the drunken captain of the HMS McCullum? Chuck him in the long boat ’til he’s sober? Or just leave him alone to pursue a T20 World Cup win?
  • A Device-like cricket-style bat in a Mexican corrido music video

Tags

Adil Rashid Alastair Cook Andrew Flintoff Andrew Strauss Animals being conspicuously indifferent to cricket Ashes Ben Stokes Brendon McCullum Chris Gayle Chris Woakes Cricket bats in unusual places Cricket media David Warner Did you see Eoin Morgan Ian Bell IPL James Anderson Joe Root Jonathan Trott Jonny Bairstow Jos Buttler Kevin Pietersen King Cricket Laurence Elderbrook Lies about pictures Matthew Hayden Michael Clarke Mitchell Johnson Moeen Ali Monty Panesar Mop-up of the day MS Dhoni Ones to watch Paul Collingwood Photos Retirement Ricky Ponting Rob Key Sachin Tendulkar Shivnarine Chanderpaul Sim Series Steve Smith Stuart Broad Virat Kohli
WordPress Theme: Maxwell by ThemeZee.
Manage Cookie Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behaviour or unique IDs on this site. Cookies may be used for personalisation of ads. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
  • Manage options
  • Manage services
  • Manage {vendor_count} vendors
  • Read more about these purposes
View preferences
  • {title}
  • {title}
  • {title}