An unexpected manufacturer of cricket equipment

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< 1 minute read

Do you know who makes the light meters that the umpires use to ruin people’s days? Do you? Do you? It’s only Megatron.

Megatron waiting for an improvement in playing conditionsFrom the Megatron website: “Megatron manufactures photoelectric cells and instruments for measuring light.”

It’s a strange choice of career for a gun that can transform into a robot, but when you consider Megatron’s evil Decepticon nature, it starts to make sense that he’d manufacture tools of spoilsportery.

“Lesser creatures are the playthings of my will,” he once said, doubtless referring to his products’ unique ability to persuade an otherwise sentient group of people that it’s practically pitch black even when the sun’s out.

First he kills Optimus Prime, then he drags everyone off the field with the Windies following-on and two new batsmen at the crease. What a complete bastard.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


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  1. We think it’s the best blog post about a manufacturer of light measuring instruments we’ve ever done.

  2. It may be the only blog post about a manufacturer of light measuring instruments that anyone has done.

    You are unique.

    That’s not necessarily a good thing, mind.

  3. If we keep this up, someone else might be tricked into thinking this post is worth commenting on.

  4. You’ve got me hooked already.
    I’d always thought that Darryl Hair was “a bit megatron”.

  5. That was always my way of bringing traffic to a post.

    Respond to all comments, and watch the oiks and ne’erdowells come a flocking.

  6. I’m an oik but I don’t think this post is worth commenting on.

    Darn, I’ve just commented on it.

  7. Hurrah! Would much rather be considered a ne’erdowell. Especially by you, Suave!

  8. Tee, is that the same meaning of ‘Rodimus’ or are you just using it in place of any old word?

Comments are closed.