Cricket Revolution screenshots

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New cricket game! It’s not out yet though, so we’ve no idea how good it is.

It doesn’t matter really. If our short-lived, poorly-paid career as a videogame ‘journalist’ taught us anything, it’s that previews of games only need pictures.

athrapatta.jpg

Mervyn Athrapatta’s going along nicely.

There can be no racism if everybody's white

We’ve rather unhelpfully shrunk this screenshot down so much that you can’t make anything out. If we hadn’t done that, you’d have been able to see that Kumar Sangappora’s vital statistics are as follows:

  • Face: short
  • Weight: feather
  • Height: type one

He’s also Caucasian, unlike many Sri Lankans.

Massive hands required

It’s Dad’s old ‘bowling several balls simultaneously’ trick – only this time it’s TO THE MAX!

Here’s the official website from where you can glean actually-not-very-much-more information.

SIGN UP FOR THE KING CRICKET EMAIL!

Or WG Grace and Billy Murdoch will be forced to come round your house and...

... do things...

29 comments

  1. That looks absolute shite!

    Dear lord, I bet they get some buffoon like FatHeadFlatTrackBully to sign up for it, and put his stupid ugly face all over it..

    If that happens, I’m visiting their offices, fully loaded up, and the aftermath will be like the scene in the 1st Matrix film, where they rip up the foyer of the headquarters type building.

  2. I just looked at their screenshots. I can’t believe that all the players are Caucasian! They go to the effort of dressing each individual crowd member differently, but then make all the players Caucasian? I don’t like the sound of this cricket “revolution”.

  3. It can only have been written by South Africans..

    Actually, I just looked it up..

    Mindstorm Studios is based in Lahore.

    Why would Pakistani developers make all the players white?

    Very strange.

  4. The game website has a forum …

    One of the things being discussed is whether the game will incorporate (a) random wrong umpire decisions and (b) other human factors in the umpires’ decisions such as the umpire getting fed up of over-zealous appealing. This is precisely the kind of supergeeky point that I thought would appall me, but actually I find myself LOVING it! I may have to get this game now.

  5. No, Miriam. That’s how they get you. They make you think that realistic umpiring can only happen in an all-white world.

    How much more genocide will be committed in the name of humanised decision-making in computer games?

  6. I’ve just spent that last three years whatching some of those buildings being errected from my former vantage point hight over the south bank of the river thames. That’s a river that is decidedly NOT in Manc.

    Re: the white bread nature of that Pak/Lanka match up there. Is this game actually out, or might those shots be some sort of early development images, using “generic cricket sprite #5687”, or or Shaun Pollock as he’s known to his mum.

    (do game people even talk about sprites these days? How 1992 am I?)

  7. Massively, massively 1992.

    The question is, just how much more 1992 could you be?

    The answer, of course, is none – none more 1992.

  8. I’m not sure that it is still at “generic cricket sprite” stage, as they have put in some physical differences between the players – eg in the “India – Pakistan” screenshot the slip fielder has a beard.

    The game in the “England – Australia” screenshot appears to be played in ancient Egypt.

  9. Well well, Dr!!

    Well done on completion of your PhD.

    Now that you’ve finished that, maybe you can enter the 21st century like the rest of us!

  10. Steady on, Suave. Let’s not go racing away into the 21st century before we’re ready.

    You’re getting ahead of yourself.

  11. the 21st century?
    Bah, over rated if you ask me. It’s been just terrorism, war, death, and autralian cricketing hegemony.

    Give me the halcyon days of the early 1990s. It was all super nintendos, cheap ice beers and, erm, autralian cricketing hegemony.

  12. Couldn’t be bothered typing ‘Australian cricketing hegemony’ twice, eh? Thought you’d copy and paste it, did you? Thought no-one would notice?

    Well we’re onto you, Dr Scientician. We’re onto you.

  13. Either he couldn’t be bothered, or, like in “Miss Wyoming”, he always makes that mistake, and that’s the error that will enable him to be tracked down, wherever he is, until the end of time.

  14. PhD’s are weren’t the paper they’re written on, these days

    Poor spelling, lazy work..

    It seems any fool can become a Dr. these days.

  15. Sorry Dr Scientician..

    I promise not to laugh at your dyslexia again.

    Those Kings eh, no respect for your average serf.

  16. Excellent work, Dr Scientician. Respect. The trifecta is indeed complete, although I will never tire of the joke.

  17. That texturing is something else. I bet you’ll need at least an 80386 with 2mb of ram.

    John Carmack must be pi**ing himself.

Comments are closed.