Hopefully it’s just a series of flukes

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< 1 minute read

We said that due to the swing-friendly conditions Kevin Pietersen’s hundred might prove handy. For similar reasons we picked James Anderson as England’s top wicket-taker and Kyle Mills to bowl most overs in this match. In the last Test, we picked Daniel Vettori and Monty Panesar to be the top wicket-takers.

It’s almost – ALMOST – like we know what we’re talking about. We’re not happy about it at all. If you wanted sense, reason and insight you wouldn’t be here.

We need to break this curse. Maybe we’ll start listening to Ian Botham and give his opinions some serious consideration. That should do the trick.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


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  1. Listening to Ian Botham would just be silly. We may not want insight and knowledge, but we don’t want repetative nonsense, either. Unless it involves a picture of a cat.

  2. The man’s brain is pickled by red wine!
    Duncan Fletcher once asked beefy for selectorial advice..

    Get rid of all the guys like Atherton, Caddick and Tufnell’ he told me.
    ‘Why?’ I asked.
    ‘Because they are too old. Go with youth’ he replied.
    ‘Who then?’ I asked.
    ‘Graeme Hick and Robin Smith’, he said.
    ‘But hold on , they are the same age’, I replied in exasperation.
    His reply I could not then believe. ‘But they are different’ he said.
    That was the last time I used Botham for selectoral advice

    Beefy is a fruit cake.

  3. You would go on and on about the COMING OFF FOR LIGHT and the PUBLIC and the NONSENSE and the not going up HIGH THINGS and the COMING OFF FOR LIGHT and the BROAD and the VIV and the COMING OFF FOR LIGHT and the RIGHT LENGTH and the COMING OFF FOR LIGHT NONSENSE PAYING CUSTOMERS…

  4. repetitive nonsense?

    Oh come one lemon bella, you’ve been reading this crap for long enough to know repetitive nonsense is KC’s prime comedic weapon. Repeat until funny, that’s how to do it.

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