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Category: England

August 20, 2015 Australia / England

When is a day a fifth of a Test match?

< 1 minute readWe’re all for the ebb and flow of Test cricket with all its nuance and scope for recovery, but all in all we’d much rather see Australia being bowled out for 60 in the span of time normally reserved for a football match. There’s a cycling commentator who routinely uses

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August 19, 2015 Australia / England

Duke balls, five-day pitches and the final Test of the summer

2 minute readMike Selvey has written a nice piece about balls. The word ‘caresser’ is used at one point. He is, of course, writing about Dukes balls, the cricket ball used in England which swings for way longer than the crappy, inferior Kookaburra ball. It has a bigger seam too. It’s a

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August 12, 2015 Australia / England

Why has no-one made fun of Darren Lehmann for that ‘hiccup’ comment?

< 1 minute readThe thing about hiccups is that they almost always come as a plural. You might cough once, you can get away with a single sneeze, but hiccups arrive en masse. As such, Darren Lehmann’s description of the Cardiff Test as ‘a minor hiccup’ seems entirely fitting. Far from being symptomatic

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August 10, 2015 England

Ben Stokes can swing a cricket ball and also a bat, but we don’t need to be told that he isn’t Botham or Flintoff

2 minute read“We don’t want to say he’s going to be the next Botham, or the next Flintoff,” said Trevor Bayliss. England’s coach then veered away from an already painfully familiar statement somewhat by adding: “He’ll be the next Ben Stokes” – as if we’ve had one already. Every time anyone says

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August 8, 2015 Australia / England

Did England just win the 2015 Ashes?

< 1 minute readThey completely did. They fully did. What do you make of that? And as a bonus talking point, Michael Clarke seems likely to retire at the end of the series. We presume he’s only waiting that long lest Steven Smith feel the pressure to follow suit immediately after leading the

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August 7, 2015 Australia / England

A homogenous batting line-up with the same strengths and weaknesses

3 minute readThis is the closest representation of Australia’s innings we can find. But why? Why would men whose job it is to bat – and who have been selected because they are supposedly the best at that task – repeatedly try and edge balls that weren’t going on to hit the

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August 6, 2015 Australia / England

Stuart Broad tears Australia a new one

< 1 minute readEarly wickets are always key and with his 19th delivery, Stuart Broad struck. Of course he already had four wickets by that point and it didn’t take him too much longer to pick up another three. Was it a rain delay? Were these actually just highlights? No, because rain delays

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August 5, 2015 England

Bread in the toaster, kettle on and OH DEAR LORD NO!

2 minute readYou can run out of some foods without too much of a problem. You can always use a different kind of vinegar. You can make that marinade without oregano. Chilli con carne without kidney beans is perfectly acceptable. On the other hand, playing a Test match without James Anderon is

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July 31, 2015 Australia / England

The latest Ian Bell update has been released and it’s full of bugs and new features

< 1 minute readWe’re way past Ian Bell 2.0. Being as he’s 33 and batting at three, we’re going to call this incarnation Ian Bell 33.3. Hopefully that won’t prove to be its batting average. Most of the previous Ian Bells have looked solid only to get out in infuriating fashion when you

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July 30, 2015 Australia / England

Mitchell Johnson rocks England, Steven Finn rolls Australia

2 minute readOnce again, Mitchell Johnson rocked England. He took 2-66. (Wickets taken via bouncers count double, it seems.) After that, it was back to England dismissing clueless Australian batsmen, which was really rather delightful. This Test has brought back memories of the magical folding Australia side of a few years ago.

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Latest comments

  1. Sam on If you want to bat for England, bat for Surrey. If you want to bowl for England, bowl for Sussex. And if you want to open for England…April 15, 2026

    Bad news https://www.telegraph.co.uk/gift/3be120e67bef2c6e

  2. King Cricket on A black standard poodle being conspicuously indifferent to a very good cricket book that you should definitely buyApril 13, 2026

    Have you seen the photo of him on the Beeb? Not the most flattering. He looks like Albert Steptoe.

  3. A P Webster on A black standard poodle being conspicuously indifferent to a very good cricket book that you should definitely buyApril 13, 2026

    Was unbeaten with the bat in both innings as well. An up-and-coming all-rounder

  4. Sam on A black standard poodle being conspicuously indifferent to a very good cricket book that you should definitely buyApril 13, 2026

    Decent performance from Lancashire's skipper. Looks a good prospect. Shame second division doesn't count.

  5. Ged Ladd on A black standard poodle being conspicuously indifferent to a very good cricket book that you should definitely buyApril 9, 2026

    Clearly someone once said told Peter Svidler en passant [did you see what I did there] that cricket is like…

RSS Animals being conspicuously indifferent to cricket

  • A black standard poodle being conspicuously indifferent to a very good cricket book that you should definitely buy
  • A cat finally being won over to cricket by the sheer ridiculousness of the Ashes
  • A cat continuing to maintain almost ostentatiously conspicuous indifference to cricket

RSS Match reports

  • Match Report: Ireland vs England, 2nd T20, Malahide
  • Keep your enemies closer | a 2019 Edgbaston Ashes Test match report
  • Match report: Sixes, Fulham

RSS Cricket bats in unusual places

  • A black standard poodle being conspicuously indifferent to a very good cricket book that you should definitely buy
  • A very high quality cricket book with a lagoony backdrop
  • A Device-like cricket-style bat in a Mexican corrido music video

About King Cricket

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Recent Posts

  • If you want to bat for England, bat for Surrey. If you want to bowl for England, bowl for Sussex. And if you want to open for England…
  • A black standard poodle being conspicuously indifferent to a very good cricket book that you should definitely buy
  • Skullwatch: Jamie Smith looks safe then
  • It’s time for some unsettling disloyalty: If England’s leaders aren’t being ejected then some of the players will be… but which ones?
  • How can you, as an England fan, possibly tolerate this world without skulls?

Tags

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