England’s World T20 campaign so far

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There was lightning and then some of you made a decent fist of defining what a ‘ferret’ is. Wine was drunk, commetators were pilloried, Cricinfo scorecards were badmouthed. Business as usual. We feel we’re now right back up to speed in time for the remainder of the tournament.

We’re particularly looking forward to Wednesday’s match, which is no match at all. Who will win? Can anyone win? How will we know if someone wins and does it matter?

Then, on Thursday, England will lose to Sri Lanka. Will Lasith Malinga need to bowl four overs?

Or could England find ‘that spark’. Tim Bresnan defines this mystical thing thus:

“Stringing together everything at the same time is a problem for us. If we can find that spark and everything clicks, we can beat anyone in the world.”

So ‘that spark’ is basically batting, bowling and fielding better than whoever they happen to be playing. Becoming the best team in the world is the spark England need to get them going.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


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  1. We had so much fun while you were away, KC…

    …but I think I speak for all of us when I say how glad I am that you are now back.

    It was fun, like my parents’ house was fun when I was a teenager and they went away on holiday. But in such circumstances, “fun” can soon turn to “out of control” and “how am I going to explain THAT?”

  2. “England will lose to Sri Lanka”. I like the optimism. Can we at least pretend that the team has a chance?

  3. mmm. can’t really see england pulling that one off i must admit. then again, sri lanka have all the “momentum” – so possibly england have a chance after all?

    based on purely cricketing rationale, recent form etc etc, one would indeed expect the lankans to walk it. malinga’s bowling arm must be twitching excitedly at the mere thought of those english wickets… i bet he’s slinging down yorkers in his sleep.

    on another note, shane shillingford is cleared to bowl again – so long as he doesn’t use the doosra {yawn}… bloody illegal actions… load of nonsense… arse

    (degenerates into incoherent expletives)

  4. I am still sticking to my “any half-competent team can win the T20 World Cup” theory. So my pick is England. Who’s willing to bet $100?

    1. I think you might have confused ‘half-competent’ with ‘rubbish’, there.

    2. Pah! $100 is a rubbish bet. How about betting that Kylie Minogue album that you bought on vinyl when you were twelve, your favourite pet, those “special” photos you took of your wife / girlfriend / husband / boyfriend / self / favourite pet, and your reputation. That last one alone must be worth nearly a dollar.

    3. I’d bet mine back, but unfortunately I lost it several years ago in a pub quiz:

      Question: Which is farthest north – Coventry, Norwich or Peterborough?

      Me: Don’t know, but I’d stake my reputation on it not being Norwich.

      I’m told I can get a new one, but it does seem like quite a lot of effort.

    4. If you text bcci-fo-eva to Lalit Modi, he’ll send you one by mail. Free shipping too, if you have no qualms having (or rather, being) damaged goods.

    5. That famous Australian shopkeeper Dan Murphy has just had AU$200 of my not-especially-hard-earned cash in settlement of a bet. Fleurie, Chateauneuf du Pape, some claret, some Burgundy, Rioja, and even a Barolo. The ultimate recipient of this largesse, Mornington Peninsula resident, grade cricketer and all-round annoying sod, would have raised a toast to the Australian captain with each bottle, except that he despises Michael Clarke with a passion. I suspect Darren Lehman will fill in, but if I were him I’d toast Alastair Cook as the key man in providing his winnings.

      Meanwhile, I’m still working through the Barossa Valley collection I won in September, but they’ve all gone a bit sour.

    6. It was either that or English wine. He offered to come all the way to England to kill me in person if I settled the bet with English wine.

    7. In those circumstances, it would be the least he could do, Bert, despite the inconvenience and expense.

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