Kent v Durham Pro40 match report

Posted by
< 1 minute read

Lemon Bella’s sent in another match report:

The day started off badly after I had to scrabble around under the seat of my car to find enough change for the car park ticket machine. They’ve put the price up by 50p. On the positive side, I not only found 50p but also my spare phone charger which I’ve been looking for for ages.

When I got to the ground, I pressed the wrong button on the coffee machine and got a “café au lait” rather than a “café crème”. This was probably one of the best mistakes I’ve ever made in drink selection. It turns out that the café au lait contains significantly more cream than the café crème.

After the interval there were some drunk men sat in front of me who took 6 overs to subtract 89 from 204. The answer is 115. I worked that out in my head before Steve Harmison had walked back to his mark.

Darren Stevens hurt himself. I didn’t see how, because I was doing the crossword in The Guardian. I did see Geraint Jones do a little impression of a running man to get someone on the balcony to send on a runner, though. That was worth the extra 50p all by itself.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?


  1. Do you even write this site any more?

    Nice work Lemon Bella. Maybe you should ask for some of the fat wads of cash they get for this website. it’ll be one less ivory backs cratcher for B&B.

  2. or a spare charger?

    sorry, but I would like to know.

    You should look into the cash situation. I know for a FACT that KC is on a cool g for every post. It’s cos when he was young he wore his asbos with pride, terrorising the streets of his hood, leading quite a posse of burberry clad young folk to smash and attack at his command.

    And then Tony Blair sent him on this course to learn how to spell and write and that, and then sent him on another course to watch cricket cos it’s for posh people and hey presto, King Cricket.

    He’s a bit worried incase Gordon stops the gravy train…

  3. Just the one phone, although maybe if KC came through with some of his cash I’d be able to afford two.

    Or at least a second cup of coffee at the match.

  4. And, and, KC then has the cheek not to put the Match Reports in the “Highlights”. Honestly.

  5. I know!

    For my next match report I might comment on the actual cricket, just as a punishment.

  6. Woah. Let’s not do anything rash. No-one wants to hear about how well Tredwell was bowling or the great catch that Davies took.

    Match reports, old and new, are linked in the highlights.

  7. you see that, that’s the power of the people!

    I say we rise up and take the blog by force. Who’s with me?

  8. Brian, you know you’d have to go to the cricket to do that, don’t you?

    If you do go and you write a match report, we may well publish some or even most of it.

  9. That changes things slightly, I’d have to actually be there? leave it with me, I need to think this through.

Comments are closed.