Tag: Tillakaratne Dilshan

Tillakaratne Dilshan pans a hundred and is arsed about it

Tillakaratne Dilshan feels moved to skip

Tillakaratne Dilshan celebrated enthusiastically when he reached his hundred. Some will say it was because he’d got his name on the honours board at Lord’s, but we doubt that.

Dilshan is the Sri Lanka captain and his team had embarrassed themselves in Cardiff and then done little to repair their reputation at Lord’s. This Test has been hard work for him and he’d had little to show for it until he reached three figures.

Being man of the match in a Twenty20 match doubtless gives you greater material rewards than a Test hundred like Dilshan’s, but it doesn’t necessarily take a great deal of effort during the match itself. Sometimes all you need to do is bat fairly sensibly for a dozen overs when chasing a small total – that’s little more than doing your job.

At Lord’s, Dilshan has made a substantial physical investment, having spent 13 hours on the field so far; but more significantly, he’s made a huge emotional investment over that period of time. That’s why he was so arsed about his hundred and that’s why those of us who follow these matches are more arsed about such achievements as well

Strauss v Dilshan sums it up

Andrew Strauss uses his 'release' shot to release himself from purgatory

When Tillakaratne Dilshan opened the bowling, Andrew Strauss couldn’t get him off the square. This was largely because he couldn’t make contact with the ball.

When one of the most experienced batsmen in English cricket finds himself in this position against a part-time off-spinner, you have to ask yourself whether his team could ever win a World Cup on the subcontinent? Never say never, but think the word to your heart’s content.

It may have been one of the best campaigns ever from an entertainment point of view, but cricket-wise England were like a baby deer on roller skates going down a hillside – constantly in danger of falling, with every upright second merely postponing the inevitable.

One of the main reasons why England’s World Cup efforts are always so ineffectual is because people like us aren’t particularly bothered when they get knocked out. We would have absolutely loved to have seen England in the World Cup final, but their absence from it brings virtually no pain.

That Tillakaratne Dilshan’s doing stuff of late, innee?

Tillakaratne Dilshan batterising the bowlerisersWe’ll be honest with you. The Champions’ Trophy won’t be getting our full attention. Partly we’re a bit tired with the relentless fixture list, partly it’s because England are likely to be toss, mostly it’s because we’re going on holiday next week. So excuse us if there’s a cursory air about some of our reportage.

We’re going to try though. Tillakaratne Dilshan hit a hundred against South Africa yesterday, so the theme of today’s post is: That Tillakaratne Dilshan’s doing stuff of late, innee?

It’s a good theme, we’re sure you’ll agree, but maybe that’s not enough insight for you, in which case here are some statistics to flesh things out a bit. Statistics are easy and give the impression that we’re making an effort when really we aren’t.

  • One-day international average in batting positions three to eight: 28.88
  • One-day international average as opener: 52.38
  • Twenty20 average in positions three to seven: 14.71
  • Twenty20 average as opener: 46.90

A pat on the back to whoever said: “Alright there, our Tillakaratne, how’s about you open up today? T’other lad can’t find ‘is left boot and some’un needs to tek shine off it. There’s a good lad – out you go.”

Tillakaratne Dilshan largely unarsed by bowling or conditions

Tillakratne Dilshan vomitingInternational Twenty20, or T20I, has a short history, so Tillakaratne Dilshan has been able to launch himself into third place on the list of all-time run-scorers largely as a result of this tournament.

Dilshan’s scored over half his career runs in the last fortnight and a good chunk of those came in last night’s semi final against West Indies, where he hit 96 not out. Even the scorecard shows that it was the classic example of two games going on – one when Dilshan was facing and another when anyone else was on strike.

As his team mates appeared to drown in treacle, flailing around and sobbing, Dilshan gorged on the sickly sweet syrup before throwing up 12 fours and burping a couple of sixes for good measure.

Typical Fidel Edwards

Fidel Edwards - mercurialBurns in, takes 3-18, tricks you into thinking he’s finally arrived as a fast bowler, then takes 0-32 in his next spell and finally ends up with those same three wickets for about 120.

Stupid, round-armed short-arse.

Tillakaratne Dilshan’s saving Sri Lanka with 58 not out off 57 balls. We can’t quite believe that he’s 31 and we can’t quite believe that he’s averaging 37 in Tests. We thought both figures were lower. Another mindless, autopilot article about young players finally coming good goes begging.

Once upon a time, we weren’t bound by ‘facts’ and wrote what we felt like.

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