Send him in. Let him weather the marketing and do all the preparations and cooking. Then you can just swan in on Boxing Day to eat leftovers and get drunk.
No, this is Nightwatchman with an upper-case N. The Wisden cricket quarterly is doing gift packages.
If you don’t know what it’s all about, they’ve helpfully provided a few samples – a Select XI to be precise.
The point is that it’s cricket writing that isn’t so time-sensitive. They’re longer musings on the game and its effect on people. The samples include a piece by Gideon Haigh about cricket writing and a piece about the psyche of the nightwatchman (lower-case N) by Jon Hotten.
There’s also a poignant piece by our friend Sam Collins about making his film Death of a Gentleman while simultaneously trying to cope with the slow death of his mother. We knew that this was the backdrop to the film for Sam, but having read the piece we might now go and watch it again with that in mind. We daresay the whole thing’ll take on a different hue.
Each year’s Nightwatchman is £30, but if you put in the code XMAS15 you can get the 2015 Collection for £25 plus postage and packing.