Lancashire Lemurs

We’re going to the Twenty20 match on Friday, then we’re away for a week. As usual we’ve written stuff in advance, so you probably won’t notice or care that we’re gone.

Two things:

(1) When we say we’re not going to be here – we’re not going to be here. If something monumental happens, it won’t be covered. There are no prizes for saying: ‘Hey, how come you haven’t written about Rob Key’s triple hundred/Mark Ramprakash’s hundredth hundred/Andrew Symonds’ sex change’.

(2) There’ll be no-one moderating comments. If you comment for the first time, it’ll be a week before it shows up.

However, if you’ve commented before, your comment appears straight away. With that in mind, maybe you should comment now. You know, just in case. We’ll moderate the comments this evening, give you the green light and then you can all enjoy yourselves while we’re away.

Presumably you’ve got nothing to say at this minute, so we’ve a commenting task for you. Name the county you support, only give them a better nickname than the crappy official one.

As you can see, we support Lancashire Lemurs or Lancashire Legomen. We like ‘Lancashire Lancastrians’ in a perverse sort of way too, but we suspect you’re ever-so-slightly less in thrall to really blunt stupidity, so we’ll play that one down.

See. See how we played it down.

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28 Appeals

  1. Being an Essex boy, and not seeing an eagle once when I lived there, that needs o change.

    What I did see was a lot of ‘ead cases.

    So Essex ‘Ead Cases it is.

  2. Northants Steelboks isn’t exactly an original one, but it is accurate at least.

  3. Well, seing as how I too support Lancashire; I’m going for ‘county cricket club’.

    Lancashire county cricket club is Lancashire’s old nick name before they got that flipping annoying giraffe turning up for all their limited overs games.

  4. King Cricket

    June 12, 2008 at 2:25 pm

    You take that back!

    Lanky is a saint.

  5. erm….KC…..please tell me you’re not Lanky the giraffe.

  6. Where are you disappearing to for a week anyway KC?

  7. King Cricket

    June 12, 2008 at 3:08 pm

    We wish, Ed.

    Cornwall, Kirk. We’ll be ageing a decade tomorrow. It’s because of that.

  8. Lanky was worth the ticket price alone at the T20 finals last year… quality being-hot-by-a-ballage there.

    KC, you not loved up enough around here to give someone else access to moderate?

  9. King Cricket

    June 12, 2008 at 3:36 pm

    With the new, improved spam levels it’s too much of a ball-ache to foist on someone else.

    New commenters are rare anyway. Look how many we’ve had today when we’ve encouraged – no – demanded new people comment.

  10. Roughly how many spammers do you get a day?

  11. I was in Cornwall a couple of weeks ago – I do hope you’ve packed your wetsuit as the sea is a bit parky.

    How about the Surrey Slingbacks?

    or the Get Notteds?

  12. Mmmmm, spam.

  13. King Cricket

    June 12, 2008 at 4:06 pm

    Ed, between 100 and 200. It’s beyond reason.

    Mel, we’ve got our woollen Victorian one-piece primed for surf-based action.

  14. I keep trying to think of a better name for T’Bears, but as alliteration tends to be the norm and Warwickshire starts with “Wa” it’s clearly totally impossible…

    At least you now know when the spam is actually sent, right KC?

    I get loads of spam on my wordpress blog at de-noted.com only about 5 to 6 a day and akismet sucks all that out really well.

  15. Warwickshire Wallabies, perhaps? Sort of bear-like.

    You know, it’s just taken me five whole minutes to remember what Lancashire’s nickname is. And that’s despite spending far too long on their ticketing website this lunch break trying to get Roses T20 tickets. And failing miserably — looks like we’ll be in one of the many alcohol-free stands. I mean, WHAT IS THE POINT?!

    Rubbish.

    So, nicknames. Lancashire Teef***ingtotallers.

  16. King Cricket

    June 12, 2008 at 4:33 pm

    Spigot, we use Akismet. It gets perhaps a third of the spam comments, but even so we still have to check though what it does get, due to the fact it keeps branding some genuine readers as spam, despite our protestations.

    No more talk of the spam unless you want to experience THE RAGE.

  17. Durham Deviants (no – NOT from line and length – just the usual filth and depraved type deviant will suit me just dandy)

  18. KC I feel your pain.. Mark at wordpress regularly feels my wrath for putting dear Mims in the spam queue, every time she comments.

  19. KC: Sorry, I just asked out of interest.

    Mahinda: The idea of cricket minus beer is quite repugnant but I do understand why they do it. Twenty 20 is starting to attract idiots like a corpse attracts flies. It can be quite irritating to take your kids to watch a bit of cricket and to be couped up with a bunch of tossers who have to eff and blind every time someone biffs it over the rope and Tina Turner crackles through the shite stage monitors on the boundary edge.

    Maybe Tina Turner free stands would be the answer.

  20. Durham nickname – ‘Hampshire Haters’ – after they stole that Championship game on Monday.

    We can now be libelous for a whole week and no one can stop us. I’m going first:

    Graeme Smith is a — removed by moderator —-

  21. In a fit of experimentation I decided to sample a bunch of “classic” (read: horrible) foods recently, and spam was one of my stops. It’s truly repulsive. It smells more like catfood than catfood does, and has the texture of a pig made entirely of gristle that’s been genetically spliced with a foam-rubber mattress and then minced. I was going to make a blog about all the things I was eating, but then I found someone else had already done it, and had eaten far more adventurous things like spore-filled sweetcorn kernels, so I gave up.

    Steve, don’t eat it!

  22. Given their new, revolting coloured T20 kit, I’m encouraged to call Surrey ‘Surrey Sultanas’. Personally, I’d like to see them dress more like pirates (you know, bandana, sabre and all) and be called the ‘Surrey Swashbucklers’. Who knows, maybe wearing an eye patch wouldn’t actually make them perform any worse than they did yesterday?

  23. I suppose it would have to be the Kent Keys. Let’s face it, what could be better for Kent fans than 11 Rob Keys?

  24. I’m not sure which county I support. I’m from Staffordshire and they’re rubbish, but maybe I should stick up for them. Sidney Barnes was from here, so I guess we can be the Staffordshire Sidneys. Awesome. Do minor counties count? Just to cover my back, I now live in Leicester and pop down to Grace Road sometimes. The Leicestershire Linekers would be a good name, if they wanted to increase their gates by getting some football fans in.

  25. Durham Doodahs who I think are officially the crapest twenty20 team? I want a Middlesex v Durham final – it would look good / pretty. For their poor strip – The Surrey Shitstains, they should not be allowed progress beyond the group stage even if they played well.

    I have seen some children nearly taken out by flying bottles at the oval at the end of finals day [take some ****heads and add 11 hours drinking…….]

    The Hampshire Haters are the kids that did the team bus in at the Southgate twenty20 last year.

    Don’t know about the Lankys and lemurs but Stephen Harmison bears more than a passing resemblance to a sifaka! [Verreaux’s of course] I’ll see if I can find the pictures….

  26. As a fellow Lancashire man (even though technically my home town is now in Greater Manchester, but we won’t wear any of that) can I make a suggestion for Lancashire Lobbygobblers.

    It has the two-fold bebfit of sounding a bit funny and having a local reference that most people will not understand.

  27. I read that as “Lollygobblers”. Eeek.

    Matt Lucas, of Little Britain fame, once asked me if he could lick my lolly. True story.

    I refused, politely.

  28. I’d like to see my very own white rose county take a lead from our kiwi friends and jettison the phoenix in favour of the Yorkshire Flat Caps.

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