Mitchell Johnson makes friends in New Zealand

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< 1 minute read

From Fox Sports:

“Johnson had come to the bowling crease for the fifth over and was greeted with the ‘wanker’ chant.”

What’s the ‘wanker’ chant? Is there one particular ‘wanker’ chant that’s better known than all the others? We know a bunch of them.

We’ve all been there, haven’t we? You’re crouching down, trying to tie your shoelaces and a big group of lads just gathers round and chants ‘wanker’ at you for eight minutes straight, laughing as the tears roll down your face.

We’re not going to that conference again this year.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


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  1. I believe the “wanker” chant that is mentioned here was the one that goes “Mitchell’s a wanker” followed by five claps. It’s good fun. Catchy too.

  2. Worrying O king, worrying. Normally we just get a snippet of the sturm und drang that afflicts your regal psyche – but today it was the majority of that post (I counted the words goddam it).

    Think you ought to have a gloom alert at the beginning of such posts for those of us with a tender heart

  3. We could just build it into the header. That would probably be labour-saving.

  4. We would not want to save on labour during these difficult times your Highness!! There isn’t enough work to go around.

    Heck, we’ll even pay to have crowds chant the ‘wanker chant’ whenever Mitchell Johnson’s around.

  5. Mitchy certainly has form for his temper but you have to give him credit for his large ones – picking a fight with the baddest looking mofo in cricket. He was armoured up and carrying a weapon, too.
    I feel a bit sorry for Mr Styris, his fans are called ‘team pig’. Those Kiwis don’t hold much for tact, now do they?

  6. Scott Styris, in the previous match. That’s why the kiwis were giving Johnson such a hard time.

  7. Perhaps that Mitchell Johnson song is a slight variant of the Lancashire supporters classic to the tune of “Son of My Father”.

    Altogether now………………….

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