Pakistan secure narrow win over England

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Pakistan held their nerve throughout a challenging 15-run chase on a mostly lifeless day three pitch and secured a narrow 10-wicket win over a thoroughly professional England side.

England kept it tight and the pressure built, but with one eye on the clock, Mohammad Hafeez and Taufeeq Umar timed their charge to perfection. On the strength of that second innings effort, we can state with a degree of conviction that Pakistan were probably the better side.

But still, while Pakistan walk away with an actual win, England can pride themselves on earning a moral victory through forcing two of their opponents to bat twice. A moral victory is worth more than an actual victory, because morality is what separates us from murderers, bankers and people who work in marketing.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


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  1. It is clear that this defeat is mainly due to the propensity of the English batsmen to plonk their legs in front of the wicket. Wickets in cricket mean batsmen. So they are making the mistake of placing their feet in front of their selves – a minor technical glitch that can be rectified by securing the batsman’s legs with ropes behind his body while Ajmal bowls, thus taking one mode of dismissal out of the equation.

  2. As a marketing manager for a large bank who has just murdered Great Auntie Ethel for the inheritence money, I take exception to your last comment.

  3. That was a heartbreakingly close match. Clearly the best team in the world had a bad day (or three)! And to top it all we’ve got those illegal deliveries from another Sub-Continental offspinner. Clearly it must be jet lag! No England team plays away from home like this right? They fight, not like those weak kneed Indians.

  4. Speaking of Marketing… I put a link to this site on my Facebook page a couple of days back and to my alarm a picture of the King Cricket T-shirt appeared next to it. I feel sullied. I thought this was a forum for like minded people, wheras in fact it is just a sophisticated marketing tool for designer clothing.

    1. If there’s any sophistication in there, it’s Facebook’s, not ours.

      And if you feel sullied by that, imagine how we feel.

  5. MS Dhoni bowled overs at a slower rate to extend the Perth test to ninth session and look what he got for extending live tv coverage! Can this argument be used to gain a toe on the morality ladder?

  6. As a marketing guy all I can think of is .. FUCK YOU KC, MARKETING IS HARD WORK… Guess i need to get my blood pressure tested after that..

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