The ECB have released a statement announcing that Samit Patel has been dropped from England’s one-day squad. We’ll paraphrase for you:
Samit Patel is fat.
We’re glad our employers don’t make press releases about the personal flaws that affect our work.
It would be disconcerting to open a newspaper and find an article about how we only ever put in the bare minimum effort and frequently waste time daydreaming about flamingos playing Connect 4.