“Oh no. We’re going to get DONE. And, and, and. And Mark says that he’s got a cane, even though it’s against the law and that he’s even got a special stripey cane for when you’re REALLY bad.”
So now we all know why players say ‘what’s said on the pitch should stay on the pitch’. It’s because it all gets massively embarrassing otherwise.
After one player called another player something else and the ICC got an actual judge to sort it out (A JUDGE!), even though it was essentially one player’s word against another; and after the BCCI threatened to take its bat (and players) home when it didn’t get its own way; we now get Matthew Hayden calling names as well. He called Harbhajan Singh ‘an obnoxious weed’.
But that isn’t the best bit. That was what preceded it.
This is a quote so beautiful, we couldn’t believe our eyes when we first read it. It’s BCCI secretary Niranjan Shah in response to Ishant Sharma’s fine for aggressive behaviour and it’s so good it’s getting a paragraph of its own and appearing in italics.
“Basically the Australian players are starting the whole thing.”
‘But they started it.’ Has there ever been a stronger defense than that. That ALWAYS works, doesn’t it?
During the next match, we fully expect Ricky Ponting to fire his finger into the air when Australia are in the field and shout ‘TELLING’, before marching off to find a figure of authority.