Andrew Strauss and Mike Gatting have a go at painting

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Not Michael Vaughan style painting. DIY style painting. We all know how rubbish cricketers are when it comes to DIY.

Andrew Strauss probably gets a man in to load the next toilet roll.

And then one rinses one's brush in the moat?

He doesn’t even know which way he’s supposed to face.

At least he’s pointing the brush the right way though.

Just have a few practice brushstrokes in the nets

Someone rotate that man through 180 degrees and tell him to carry on.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?


  1. What has made Mike Gatting so angry? I think these two pictures are part of the same narrative:

    Strauss – “Hey Gatt, is this your Test average on the scoreboard?”

    Gatting – “One more word and Cooky will be having your job”

  2. Gatt is painting an invisible canvas but at least he has paint spattered trousers.

    It is paint, yes it is, I am sure it is!

  3. Do you have a massive stockpile of photos featuring England internationals failing at relatively simple DIT tasks, or is there simply an inexplicable thirst on the part of advertisers/PR agencies for such graphic images of DIY failure?

  4. Gatting has cleaned the paint off on his trousers after demonstrating that he has been given the wrong brush. He is saying ‘this is a small brush for cutting in or gloss work. Give us rollers or we won’t be done before lunch.’

    He knows about DIY and lunch.

    The squadron leader has stepped aside to show that good chaps get on with the job however bad the tools .

  5. Yesterday a bunch of plasterers and the King of Spain. Today the current England captain and a fat Ming the Merciless. And yet all in the same uniform. What’s going on? Are they all part of some kind of ‘Cricket Force’?

  6. Mike Gatting is having a go at painting but Andrew Strauss seems to be pretty friendly with painting. This post therefore is only 50% successful.

  7. If you rotate him 180 degrees, I reckon he’ll be painting sky just to the left of what I presume is the real target.

    He needs to be rotated more 160 degrees, or at least between 170 and 140 to be certain of making contact.

    The standards of maths on KC are not what they once were.

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