Butt cracks balls and more

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< 1 minute read

Butt and upright toolWe dread to think what search engine traffic we’re going to get from that title, but you can’t sashay through life being called ‘Butt’ without some sort of consequences. It’ll teach some visitors the importance of the humble comma at any rate.

Prior to the first one-day international against Sri Lanka, Shoaib Malik said that he believed Pakistan played Ajantha Mendis better than any other side. Being as Mendis had taken seven wickets in the 14 overs he’d bowled at Pakistan, it was tempting to think that Shoaib had confused Ajantha Mendis with Mike Yardy.

However, Salman Butt then hit an unbeaten hundred and Mendis went wicketless, so we’ll give the Pakistan captain the benefit of the doubt. Khurram Manzoor hit 83, so that’s another young Pakistani opening batsman to add to the list.

Considering they rarely play, Pakistan manage to blood a hell of a lot of openers.


Mike Gatting wasn't receiving the King Cricket email when he dropped that ludicrously easy chance against India in 1993.


Why risk it when it's so easy to sign up?


  1. yeah, he definitely got mixed up. butt was expecting india to show up but sri lanka came in as replacements.

  2. I guess when he was the top boy at school he was the Head Butt.

    But I’m afraid I am simply unable to think of this player without thinking of a Smoked Salman Butty. In my cricket picnic bag with a nice crisp bottle of white wine and some cashews to nibble at before tucking in to the butties.

  3. I think that is the first time anyone has ever constructed a paragraph with all of “crisp white wine”, “smoked salmon” and “butties” in it. It might have read less jarringly if the player in question was Pakistan’s unknown young legspinner, Salman Kanapays.

  4. what a ridiculous website, it’s very hard to make head or tail of it, where are the dirty pictures please?

  5. Folking hell, I’ve been censored!

    I seem to recall you telling me I could swear on here once, cos I put asterisks in place of letters.

    Down with the king!

  6. The rules are very grey.

    If it’s funny swearing, it’s always acceptable.

    If it’s everyday speak swearing, it might get censored if there’s been a bit of a run of swearing. There’s been quite a bit of late, so you got edited. Apologies. It’s not personal.

    Be creative. We’ll never censor a ‘fork’ or a ‘frock’.

  7. Alright Pete! I think it’s some kind of fetish thing going on, with all that padding and that. Facking weird stuff mate.

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