How Joe Root failed at the Gabba in two key respects

3 minute read

You wouldn’t think there would be much nervous tension about a guy with 39 Test hundreds getting into the 90s again and maybe scoring a 40th. But there was. Fortunately for all of us, very dull asterisks against career records and the prospect of Matthew Hayden doing a lap of the MCG with his tackle out can now both be forgotten about.

It’s not beyond the realms of possibility that the fear of seeing Hayden’s hairy saddlebags swinging beneath his cowboy hat united the England and Australia players in a firm collective desire to get Root to three figures. It’s also possible that Root is a good batter capable of making Test hundreds even in Australian conditions where the almighty cumulative power of his nothing shot more often works against him. 

The end result was failure. Failure to live up to his reputation. Root’s run scoring for England is so firmly established and predictable that it has long since ceased to qualify as newsworthy. But in Brisbane, in the second Ashes Test, thanks to a long track record of coming to Australia to make fifties, he uncharacteristically made the headlines for hitting a century again.

This was no “Joe Root also made a hundred” day.

It’s unusual territory this for Root: people paying anything more than the most perfunctory attention to him. He deserves it really.

Those who really had their eye on things then witnessed a second failure. With 40 minutes to go and nine wickets down, England were looking forward to getting a crack at Australia’s openers. (A far more appealing prospect than getting an Australia opener’s crack.) Crucially, Ben Stokes didn’t want to declare though – nine wickets down, day one Ashes declarations haven’t historically worked out for him. The job was therefore to throw caution to the wind; make a few quick runs; and then get out.

Jofra Archer duly engaged the long handle, while Root shifted into reverse gear and started enjoying himself.

Joe Root? Joe Hoot more like.

Alas, while the two of them successfully delivered the ‘quick runs’ part of the agreement, they utterly failed to get out.

This was despite the best efforts of Archer, who selflessly skied one that could quite comfortably have been taken by either Alex Carey or Marnus Labuschagne, but which each man left for the other – a strange decision given the two of them had been all but entwined when Carey caught Gus Atkinson.

If it works, stick with it. Tangle your limbs together and take the catch, lads.

Going back to the matter at hand, did you know that Joe Root has never made a hundred in Bangladesh? Or in Ireland. Hitting Test hundreds in Australia is easy – at least he gets the chance to bat there.

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