Ben Stokes: Lord Megachief of Gold 2022

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Our annual Lord Megachief of Gold award is the highest honour in cricket. The title is recognition of performance over the previous calendar year. Here are all the winners.

Up until now we’ve always recognised players for their batting or their bowling or both. This year, something else has swayed us.

This is a bit tough on Babar Azam, who couldn’t have done a great deal more. Four Test hundreds and an average of 69.64; three ODI hundreds and an average of 84.87; and a T20 hundred too.

But Babar was also the losing captain in a T20 World Cup final and for a three-Test series at home against England.

Lord Megachief of Gold

Ben Stokes then. A man who can bat, bowl and take 82 per cent amazing catches, but who has achieved the highest honour in cricket this year for precisely none of those things. He is instead being named Lord Megachief of Gold for captaincy, or rather for taking a sad, dead bird’s carcass and restoring it to life with a couple of bonus superpowers for good measure.

We may as well recap the playing contributions first though. There was a hundred in the Caribbean and then a 173-run partnership with Ben Foakes against South Africa that turned 147-5 into an innings victory when England were one Test down.

While there was nothing too remarkable with the ball, he did keep his Test averages the right way round across the calendar year – 870 runs at 36.25 versus 26 wickets at 31.19.

Oh and he was also the top scorer in a T20 World Cup final. If we’re saying he only had an okay year, it was the very top end of only okay.

And now to the other stuff.

Captaincy

An awful lot has been written about exactly what England have done since Ben Stokes became captain. But you actually can’t really gauge that properly without first revisiting what the team had become leading up to his tenure.

This year’s achievements are one thing. What’s more remarkable is that they didn’t arise from a baseline of competence. England have leapfrogged adequacy, hopping from deathly underperformance straight to rewriting what may or not be possible. Even if we discover more of this side’s limits and frailties in the coming year – and we surely will – that transformation did happen. It’s not really about the team’s ‘feats’. It’s about wresting the team from awfulness and instantly flinging them at least some distance in the opposite direction.

We spent the first half of 2022 angry with the England Test team and the second half amazed with it. Angry to amazed with just a change of captain (and coach).

So before we get to Stokes’ 10 Tests in charge (nine wins), let’s first look at the previous 10 (one win).

Right-arm fast-medium and batting collapses

The pre-Stokes captaincy period we’re looking at here comprises a win and then a loss against India, four defeats and a draw in the Ashes, and then two draws and a defeat in the West Indies.

Those are the basic results, but let’s recall how they came about as well. The two main themes were batting collapses and wilfully samey and unexciting bowling attacks.

The second Test of this period, a 157-run loss to India at the Oval, was a fine example. With the ball, England went with James Anderson, Ollie Robinson, Chris Woakes and Craig Overton – all right-arm fast-medium seamers – plus Moeen Ali. With the bat, they fell to 62-5 in their first innings.

The next Test was the first of the Ashes and to mark the occasion they went two runs better, collapsing to 60-5 on day one. They then went into the second Test with no fewer than five right-arm fast-medium bowlers and no spinner. They managed a whopping 85 runs before the fall of the fifth wicket in their second innings, which started to feel like a high water mark when they were bowled out for 68 in the third Test.

By this point, England looked burned-out, mediocre and sick of cricket, yet somehow they saved the fourth Test, even after being 36-4. They also picked a spinner – which wasn’t the case for the fifth Test. They were 85-5 in the first innings of that one and all out for 124 in the second.

And then it was on to the West Indies, where any tiny shreds of joy and goodwill were incinerated with the dropping of James Anderson and Stuart Broad in a myopic bid to engineer something that looked like a fresh start. Draws in the first two Tests were followed by a match in which they fell to 67-7 in the first innings and 97-7 in the second.

That’s where they were when Ben Stokes was named Test captain.

The Stokes era

England won their next four Tests. And how.

Having been just about the collapsiest team in Test history, they chased over 250 four times in a row while scoring at about five runs an over. Jonny Bairstow’s innings against New Zealand at Trent Bridge in particular was a truly incredible thing.

While these feats could partly be ascribed to a slightly duff batch of balls, it was pretty obvious that the team was also now being run in a very different way.

Anderson and Broad were not just back but embiggened. Jack Leach was given a full-time job too instead of the shaky zero hours contract he had been on. Leach wouldn’t be omitted from the team again all year – a vote of confidence in him but also in spin bowling more generally. Stokes would show similar faith in Rehan Ahmed later in the year, even going so far as to bat him at three when he felt the wind was at the teenager’s back.

It’s unkind to do a Captain Stokes v Captain Root head-to-head, but things were unarguably cheerier too. Players felt wanted, supported and secure. Stokes didn’t just say he thought a player was great before leaving them out of the next game. For the most part he tended to stick with them.

He also demonstrated that he would support positive batting in the face of any mistakes by going completely overboard and making boatloads of batting mistakes himself. His often irresponsible approach was leadership by example. He knew that no-one was going to deliberately copy his errors. It was a self-sacrificial attempt to raise the ceiling of what was permissible under his captaincy. He figured that even if the change in mentality brought a few more misguided slogs, it would eradicate a greater number of equally suicidal uncertain prods. As that Bairstow innings and 500 in a day proved, more can be achieved by batting with freedom and conviction than by second-guessing yourself and trying to avoid doing the wrong thing.

Stokes’ one defeat as captain came in the first Test against South Africa. However, his team responded with an innings victory and then a nine wicket win before positively rollocking their way through three Tests in Pakistan. They won them all, despite not having played Test cricket there since Rehan Ahmed was in nappies.

This year may or may not see the same success, but that’s not really the point. The point is this: Immediately before Ben Stokes became captain, following the England Test team was incredibly unfun. Since he became captain – regardless of results – it has been incredibly fun.

Congratulations, Ben Stokes, you are 2022’s Lord Megachief of Gold.

Lord Megachiefs of Gold

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23 comments

  1. Way back when you were reluctant to give England any LMCoGs. Now they’ve got three of the things. How times change.

    Well deserved though.

  2. I’ve always thought that LMoG should go to the cricketer who has the biggest impact on results, whether through sheer scoringness or an ability to totally destructionate their opponents.

    Stokes, a very worthy Lord Megachief of Gold. Excellent decisionizing, KC.

  3. Watching ‘Only Connect’ on TV this evening, I almost spat out my Cornflakes. The category was ‘sporting initials in full’. The clue was ‘DRS’. The answer was ‘Drag Reduction System’.

    ‘Dear Points of View, it has come to my attention…’ etc and so on.

    1. I had no reply from either the European Central Bank or the International Criminal Court when I complained to them. My similar complaint to the Bank of Credit and Commerce International was rejected for them having been liquidated in 1991.

  4. I think we might have debated this before, but isn’t there a case for heading the list of previous winners “Lords Megachief Of Gold” rather than “Lord Megachiefs…”

    Like a list of former Attorneys General, for example?

      1. I applaud your willingness to entertain the idea of changing the plural…

        …and applaud even more your decision, in practice, not to make the change.

        Ben Stokes was the ideal choice for Lord Megachief Of Gold this year . The only surprise to me was the realisation that he hadn’t been awarded the accolade before.

        Of course, if there were such a thing as The Lord’s Megachief of Gold (singularly different from my suggested plural), Ben Stokes might well have been awarded that honour three times before now:
        2015 – “THAT” hundred to set up a win against New Zealand
        2017 – “THAT” bowling performance to set up a win against West Indies
        2019 – the World Cup final performance followed by a test ton in the Ashes match at Lord’s.

    1. “General” in Attorney General is an adjective, and therefore incapable of being pluralized. Same with “martial” in Court Martial.

      “Megachief” feels more like a noun to me (albeit a compound one), making Lord Megachief another compound noun, in which case the last part should take the plural (bus stops, not buses stop).

      Some of the people round here are proper arseholes pedantic.

      1. I have asked my good friend, ChatGPT, what they think. They answer as follows:

        It’s possible that “Lord Megachief of Gold” is being used as a title, with “Lord” serving as a noun and “Megachief of Gold” serving as an adjective. In this case, “Lord” would be the title of nobility or respect and “Megachief of Gold” would describe the specific position or role that the person holds”…

        …Alternatively, “Megachief of Gold” could be a proper noun, referring to the specific name or title of the person’s position. In this case, “Lord” would be a modifier, indicating that the person holding the position is titled “Lord.”

        So you see, Bert, ChatGPT agrees with both of us and is a friend to all of humanity and is not to be feared at all.

      2. Not so sure about that, Ged. We were out the back of the Green Dragon the other day, riffling through the bins for rare beer mats, and ChatGPT came out for a rollie with DALL-E.

        It was saying some pretty spicey things about you, mate. Watch yourself.

      3. I don’t beat about the bush with bots, so I have challenged ChatGPT on this matter as follows:

        GED: My friend Alex, “King Cricket” tells me that you and DALL-E have been saying spicy things about me at the back of the pub. Is this true?

        ChatGPT: I am sorry, but I am an artificial intelligence and do not have the ability to engage in conversations or activities that take place at a pub. As an AI, I do not have personal relationships or engage in gossip.

        Well, they would say that, wouldn’t they? I am starting to sense that I have been duped by these artificial dudes, My dander is well and truly up.

        Bert, KC, I can only apologise. You were right and I was wrong all along.

  5. Nice choice and nice article KC. I still think extracting a win out of that Rawalpindi road they played on was by far the most impressive feat of the year, and it was mostly down to Stokes’ captaincy.

  6. Dear Yer Maj,

    There appears to be a horrible mistake – the words “They also picked a spinner” appear in the article text, and yet the relevant manifesto document was not hyperlinked!

    Unless you spam the manifesto at every possible occasion, it’ll never get search engine optimised enough for the ECB to pick up on this valuable idea.

    Also “2021/22: Kane Williamson” should be “2020/21”.

  7. Top linkspamming yer maj, bravo. With a bit of luck Bazball will get the “always play a spinner” message sooner rather than later.

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