This is a quote from Australia’s federal defence minister, Stephen Smith. And yes, you read that job title correctly.

“Well historically of course there have been a series of atrocities committed by the Australian Cricket Board or Cricket Australia or the Australian selectors against Western Australian cricketers but this one is extraordinary. This one is very high at the top of the list.”

Atrocities? You’d think someone in Smith’s line of work might hold words like that back for when he really needs them.

Meanwhile, Cricket Australia’s head of cricket operations, Michael Brown, has seen fit to question the idioms used by Katich when complaining about losing his contract:

“I certainly don’t support the idea that you pay peanuts you get monkeys.”

We get the impression that Brown has taken that comment literally and while he’s resolute in public, behind the scenes he’s despatched some specialists to do a series of species checks on the selection panel.

Simon Katich – remember him? – hit 306 for New South Wales against Queensland. Everyone cross their fingers that he’ll get back into the Australian team in time for the next Ashes.

Australia have any number of excellent batsmen and Katich is one of them, but at least he’s got a proven track record of getting all hot-and-bothered during crucial matches and throwing big hissy fits when he gets out.

In truth a mere triple hundred isn’t such a grand achievement on a pitch where even Matthew Hayden managed to hit 179.

With reference to yesterday’s post about too much cricket, we’d like to highlight the ongoing brilliance of Australian domestic cricket’s fixture list. Each state plays ten first-class games and as there are only six states, cricket followers can comfortably follow every single first-class match.

Mean-treating, keen-keeping brilliance.