< 1 minute readCook, Trott, Cook, Trott – we’re just starting to get the hang of writing about the England Test team when Alastair Cook spazzes one straight up in the air on 96. The idiot. Now what have we got? A load of half stories, that’s what. Alastair Cook scores most of
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Jade Dernbach chooses to use his ‘doing arm’
< 1 minute readThanks to Sam for pointing this out – although he did make the mistake of saying “Jade Dernbach has got a tattoo on his doing arm,” which is not quite correct. In reality, the tattoo DENOTES the doing arm. Dernbach is merely acknowledging this by choosing to bowl right-handed –
Continue readingA not-at-all hubristic graph about England’s recent Test form
2 minute readBert writes: Pride comes before a fall, they say. But surely that’s obvious. If you’re ever going to be proud, the time to do it is definitely BEFORE a fall. There’s nothing to be proud about AFTER the fall – you’re too busy being embarrassed and having grazed knees. With
Continue readingSri Lanka slightly taken aback by England attack
< 1 minute readImagine you’re Sri Lanka. You’re four days into the world’s most uneventful bike ride. You’re in the middle of the Nullarbor Plain on a beautiful flat road and you can clearly see that there is nothing threatening for 50 miles in any direction. You’re tootling along at about 8mph feeling
Continue readingIan Bell’s year – an actual opinion
< 1 minute readDon’t be afraid. We’re experimenting with having opinions. We meant to say it before the first Test – and maybe this isn’t the best timing when he’s on 98 not out – but we think Ian Bell will be England’s best batsmen in the next 12 months. Ashes 2010-11 Bell’s
Continue readingJonathan Trott is relentless
< 1 minute readJonathan Trott is on holiday with his family. They decide to play table tennis – winner stays on. After Trott has won the first 18 games, Mrs Trott quietly suggests that he might like to find a way to let the kids win a couple. Trott says no. After 86
Continue readingPlaying Sri Lanka will be hard work
< 1 minute readA good first day of Test cricket for England, in the sense that it put them straight. Playing Sri Lanka demands perseverance. It demands perseverance so earnest it comes with a pipe and a scowl. If Sri Lanka’s feisty wins in their warm-up matches hadn’t got the message through to
Continue readingDropping Kevin Pietersen from the England Test team
< 1 minute readWe’re not a fan of this idea. You might say that we’re too easily pleased; that we’d support any batsman who scored thousands of runs for England with unparalleled panache. But you’d be wrong. There’s another thing. We once made Kevin Pietersen say ‘pie’. You can’t buy an experience like
Continue readingHaving Eoin Morgan in the Test team is no bad thing
< 1 minute readNot sure if this opinion is even a slightly different shade of grey to the one the other day. Morgan or Bopara? Sounds like it was close. The national selector, Geoff Miller, said: “The controlled innings that Eoin played just gave him the nod.” When a batsman is being picked
Continue readingHaving Eoin Morgan in reserve is no bad thing
< 1 minute readWe’ve a lot of time for both Ravi Bopara and Eoin Morgan. Far from feeling it necessary to identify one as being a better bet for the Test team, we’re simply happy that one of them misses out. The true strength of the great Australian Test teams of yesteryear was
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